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THE CURIOUS INDEX, 3/22/2013

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THE CI IS ALL SEC TODAY, BASICALLY.

Joe Robbins

WHEN YOU WORK AT HOME YOU RUN OUT OF PANTS FAST. We were at Vandy's spring practice yesterday, and the highlights were the following items:

  • James Franklin made fun of our green pants. We really need to buy new pants.
  • Wes Johnson, Vandy's starting LT this spring, has taken 2462 snaps as a starter at four different positions and has ZERO false starts in his career.
  • Scot Aiello, a relatively unheralded special teams/DB guy, is 180 pounds and deadlifts 500 pounds. Translation: he is very, very strong.
  • Vanderbilt has a very fun practice with lots of James Franklin bouncing around and yelling at people. Think Pete Carroll with a goatee and less yelling out of the word "TOKYO!" and you're getting close.

YOU JUST KEEP DOING WHATEVER MR. SABAN SAYS, SIR. Bill Battle will be the new AD at Alabama, and he'll keep doing what Mal Moore did: writing checks to football whenever they say "please write us a check." (P.S. Nick Saban does not say "please.")

THAT'S A BIT REDUNDANT. Les Miles said the LSU offense will be limited in the first spring scrimmage, which really could have just been shortened to "The LSU offense will be."

THE BAD NEWS AND THE GOOD NEWS. The bad news is that Jarvis Jones looked kind of fat and out of shape at his pro day. The good news for Georgia fans is that Todd Gurley somehow weighs more and yet looks and feels better than he did in 2012, which is either standard spring tale-tellin', or a biological miracle that spells doom for every middle linebacker in the conference.

EVERYONE IS VERY CONFIDENT. Jeff Driskel is very confident, confidently confidenting his confidence into the growing confidence of his offense with a c and an o and an n and an f and an i and a d and an ence. .

HE'LL HELP YOU IF HE CAN, MATE. Brad Wing is happy to work with you to improve a certain aspect of Australian tourism.

THE LONE NON-SEC NOTE HERE: just putting out horrendous conspiracy theories, Oregon TE who will soon know better through SIDs going whoaaaaaa budday let's not do that.

ETC: Glad you didn't die, Ta-Nehisi Coates. The Airball: our true national pastime.