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THE CURIOUS INDEX, 3/14/2013

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THE CURIOUS INDEX MAXES OUT AND GETS AFFECTIONATE

KISS THE BAR BECAUSE YOU LOVE IT. The spring conditioning rounds usually include a full cycle of brutal weightlifting, and thanks to the wonders of cheaply made digital video you, too, can share the joys of vomit-inducting max squats. (Yes, even with Indiana football.)

The kiss of the bar at the end is deeply unsanitary. (And awesome.) (VIA)

THIS IS NOT A TYPO. Tennessee got a commit today from Jalen Hurd, a five-star running back. Repeat: Tennessee has a commit from a five-star skill player in the year 2013, and there is an Australian lady trying to rap like she's from the SWATS because the future never asks permission and doesn't care if you're ready or not.

BERKLEY DOES HAVE A TENDENCY TO MAKE ONE CHUCKLE. Not necessarily for football reasons, but Sonny Dykes' staff seems like they don't need chemical partners in order to be relaxed, funny, and sort of fixated on food.

NEWS IN SADNESS. Remember: you're not Purdue. Unless you are, and then we don't know what you're talking about.

THE LONGHORN REALLY IS THE TIP OF THE ICEBERG. We would totally believe that TAMU's announcer not only has the Red Dragon tat, but is the Red Dragon himself. [puts on footage of the Cotton Bowl] [screams "LOOK AT ME" at a bound and gagged Bob Stoops]

STILL MORE SPRINGY INTERVIEWS. TNIAAM talked with their new coach like real journalists.

ETC: THESE EMMA WATSON NUDES ARE REAL.