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LET'S JUST STOP LISTENING TO THE NCAA

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ABOUT ANYTHING EVER, REALLY.

Brian Spurlock-US PRESSWIRE

The NCAA is the topic at the mothership, and we don't know how to be any meaner about it without just drawing pictures of asses on Mark Emmert's face. As it exists, college football is already working as an extremely well-lit black market, with the weird pricing and convoluted payment structures you see in Burmese night markets. And without the piles of black market amphetamines. We think.*

But at this point we don't need some kind of vague belief in the NCAA. You need evidence of its existence as anything but an ouroboros, and a demonstration of why anyone should listen to a single goddamn thing they say about anything. Right now, it's an expensive gibberish factory, a Potemkin Village for the dead concept of monied amateur athletics, and a ghost who found a gavel and called himself a judge.

*Not saying there's a school that just serves as a front for methamphetamine trafficking. Okay, it's UTEP.