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The Curious Index is licking its lips and it's so disturbing to all of us.

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Otto Greule Jr - Getty Images

PARTY IN THE BACKFIELD, BUT NO BUSINESS UP FRONT. The Stanford offense didn't complete the mullet equation last night, losing all business up front offensively even as the party in the backfield raged on for Keith Price. Washington defensive coordinator Justin Wilcox thought it was sexy enough, though, and wooooo field-rushin'!

DAN MULLEN, WING CHAMPION. Dan Mullen did eat 24 wings in five minutes, something any professional competitive eater would tell you is just as much about technique as skill, so of course the process-obsessed head coaching type would be the victor here. Everyone on Twitter last night suggested Charlie Weis as the likely king of all coaching wing competitors, showing they clearly do not understand the human body.

The obvious champ is Lou "The Locust" Holtz, who changed jobs frequently because he depleted local livestock populations singlehandedly.

WE HOPE NOT. Could 2012 Oregon become 2004 Auburn? Oh, we really, really hope that's not even a remote possibility, since Oregon would be twice as much fun to watch as anyone else possibly locked in tie for a BCS Championship slot, and also because Chip Kelly's angered hyperspeed press conference in protest would melt the brains of anyone watching it.

BRET BIELEMA HATES THE TRUTH. We understand why, but yeah, that's pretty much Taylor Martinez, college quarterback. In response, Bielema has handed down a one-snap benching because Bret Bielema has an amazing sense of humor, and we hope it helps him when rockskippin' Taylor Martinez throws for 700 yards on his defense because that is exactly what happens when people say these things.

IT'S FIXED NOW. But for a while there last night, Mark Mangino's wikipedia page said some pretty amazing things.


Most pople assume his time at Oklahoma was most influential, but that one year at Larry coaching OL really changed the way he viewed blocking schemes and talent evaluation.

ETC: After reading about he and Woody Harrelson sailing around in the middle of a storm high off their ass on mushrooms and weed, starting to think Ted Danson's character in Bored To Death was way closer to non-fiction than one might have thought.