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HEY LOOK IT'S A DUCK ON A SURFBOARD

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Hey, abandoned children of the internet. We're still at media days, where we're drawing John L. Smith as a surfing duck with his hair on fire. He is also wearing a tie, because he is a classy anthropomorphic duck.

Gene Chizik is up right now, and he has this gigantic entourage relative to other coaches, and is wearing pinstripes. None of this is helping the Auburn Mafia mythos in the least, but then again, neither is the pinstriped suit. Don Chizik is in construction, young lady reporter who best remember to flinch when she turns the key in her car in the morning, eh? [nods, winks]

The other big development: Dan Mullen ate at Sbarro. Other than AC Leonard "transferring" from Florida and Ronald Powell getting prepped for playing this season after a knee injury, that's really the biggest news. Hugh Freeze will eat a Chik-Fil-A like a real American, and then likely RT your lunch if you ask him.