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THE CURIOUS INDEX, 9/1/2011

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MIKE LONDON IS SO EXCITED ABOUT THIS FOOTBALL SEASON.

(Via.)

JUST BECAUSE THERE IS FOOTBALL DOES NOT MEAN WE'VE STOPPED CANNIBALIZING EACH OTHER'S CONFERENCES.  BYU issues just the sweetest non-no "no" statement ever in responses to inquiries about the Big 12, while SMU is living up to its reputation by being the tartiest tart on the block, showing leg and maybe a little bit of undercheek even, and making blow-job motions in your direction, Dan Beebe. Knowing Beebe's track record, he will likely try to turn this into a threesome that implodes when one hooker realizes how much more the others are making than them.

Kirk Bohls, meanwhile, guesses that the superconference Larry Scott proposed last year will happen. He proposes it, and does not report it, since it is still hypothetical and so insane it would give college football a non-fatal aneurysm for a few years. Bill C looks at the odds and concludes that there is a 30 percent chance the SEC expands to the states of Virginias for expansion. Stop dancing, Mike London. That doesn't mean you.

Finally, this is what an A&M-inclusive SEC schedule would look like, and it makes our head hurt.

PLEASE REMEMBER: No matter what happens to Texas, they're always ranked in ESPN's eyes. Hey, look, Bill Byrne blaming ESPN for the Big 12's dissolution! And then running into the arms of the SEC, an ESPN-sponsored commodity. Lahfe can shore be funny sometimes.

THIS IS THE CHEERIEST RUG/CARPET/DOG COZY ON THE PLANET. This dog is the luckiest, most optimistic dog on the planet. Its owner is the maddest person alive if they are also the same person who made the Will Stein-themed rug.

MANTRIP IS A TOTALLY DIFFERENT THING IN FLORIDA ESPECIALLY IN SOUTH BEACH. Dana Holgorsen hhas turned the pregame at West Virginia into a virtual trip down into the mine. West Virginia is now vying for title of MOST METAL FOOTBALL TEAM and it's not even two months into the Holgorsen regime.

DON'T SAY THE 'A' WORD. Athlete is not a word that Les Miles should say around multi-talent athletes.