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A word of explanation: There is no explanation. In our misspent youth, we swear to you we had this entire list memorized and would quote from it nonstop to amuse ourselves and only ourselves. (We had few friends as children.) This came to us, and it's Friday, and it's hot outside, and all we have to entertain ourselves with is this and college athletes' strange predilection for the Lion King. We have forty ideas below. We're sure you can add to the list. Our terms are real, but yours don't have to be. Also, before somebody asks, taxonomy is not the same thing as taxidermy. Thank you.


• An obstinacy of Nutts

• A shrewdness of Kellys

• A pounce of Gators

• A cowardice of Bowdens

• A business of Sabans

• A skulk of Stoopses

• An earth of Mileses

• A bloat of Hokes

• A stud of Mendenhalls

• A cackle of Spurriers

• A leap of Princes

• A pride of Tedfords

• A richness of Chiziks

• A barren of Clawsons

• A prickle of Schnellenbergers

• A husk of Pasqualonis

• A crash of Davises

• A pod of Petersens

• A scurry of Stockstills

• A gulp of Swinneys

• A murder of Muschamps

• A horde of Pelinis

• A pitying of Englishes

• A convocation of Brileses

• A charm of Cristobals

• A boil of Johnsons

• A siege of Leaches

• An exaltation of Pattersons

• A deceit of Freezes

• A parliament of O'Briens

• An ostentation of Kiffins

• A bouquet of Neuheisels

• A congregation of Richts

• An unkindness of O'Learys

• A wisp of Dooleys

• A murmuration of Cutcliffes

• A descent of Edsalls

• A shiver of Locksleys

• A cloud of Kills

• A plague of Akeys

The Digital Viking will be sailing the rough open seas today, as Fearless Leader gets wedding-drunk and Dolla Bill and Aunt Stabby celebrate Dolla Bill's 33rd anniversary of birth. We trust you will live spicily in our absence. Go with COTG.