According to Oprah, we think*, the world is winding to an end this Saturday, May 21. We will miss you all terribly. Intrepid reader Woody Woodrum asks, "What college football games should we re-watch Friday and Saturday to give us comfort in our hour of need?" Woody, you raise an excellent point.
We were 16 when the Vawls won the national title, and too sick to go, and watched the whole thing in our parents' living room, propped up in a recliner our Daddy graciously dragged right in front of the teevee, with a box of tissues and a bottle of saline spray our only party favors, so it might be nice to relive '98 and be awake for the whole thing, but if this is really and truly THE END, we want to go out laughing. And nothing has ever amused us more than a certain giant catfish hanging four touchdowns on Pastor McParaffinhead for his senior swan song.
Willie Martinez had THREE YEARS of tape on Jonathan Crompton, a notorious, unavoidable headcase guaran-damn-teed to fold like a cheap card table in the face of a must-win situation, and Lane Kiffin left Knoxville with an undefeated lifetime record against Mark Richt thanks to El Siluro Gigante's flash-in-the-pan 310 passing yards. Whatever our feelings for Kiffykins now, this will never, ever be unfunny.
Over to you, romper room: What's the last bit of gridiron action you want to see before we all depart this earth and God's green internet? Chime in below.
*We don't care to look into this too deeply, and she seems as good a harbinger as any. We take our apocalypse dates (and really, all our life cues) from the oeuvre of Roland Emmerich and thus are holding out or a 2012 global kill event.
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