AWWWWWW.
The Beef ''''O""'''B"ra'd"y''''s Bowl* ended with that classic trifecta: a blocked punt, field goal, and then a 4th and short deep ball for a TD called against the advice of timorous NFL minds everywhere. Rock on, Marshall: who dares wins, and who ends up on the wrong end of that tweets sad faces out late at night. Mario Cristobal is still on PItt's radar despite the loss, or as Steve Pederson would say, "I like him more BECAUSE he lost." Steve Pederson is as horrible at hiring coaches as Gene Smith is at predicting NCAA penalties.
Hey, drunk FIU fans! Really drunk FIU fans. They should have better tolerances after the drinking theory and practice class, but fine, FIU grads, go ahead and disgrace the integrity of your core curriculum.
*If you're going to abuse apostrophes, abuse them hard, Beef. Mr. Beef. Whatever you are.
PENALTIES TO THE LEFT, URB GOT HIS SWAGGER BACK. The replacements for poached staff members at Florida were at times less than inspiring--hey, remember when he just let Addazio run the o-line, offense, and recruiting all at the same time? That was fun!
But when the man's on his game, he's on his game hard, as he appears to be at Ohio State. Everett Withers, interim coach at UNC and architect of some burly, well-recruited defenses from '08-'10, will join Meyer in Columbus as his defensive coordinator. Along with Tom Herman from Iowa State, Mickey Marotti from Florida, and whatever role Luke Fickell is going to play, that's some quality human resources pimpin', Urban. (Shhh. Don't mention Everett Withers' 2007 Minnesota defense. It's devastating to this argument.)
NORM CHOW IS HAPPY TO WORK WITH THE UNIQUE DEMANDS OF THE HAWAI'I JOB. Norm Chow returns home to Hawai'i, and proves that two decades of living in Utah has a hell of a karmic payoff at the end.
THIS SEEMS LIKE A GREAT IDEA. When you replace the only coach a small program has ever known with a billionaire, the comments section for your local paper gets fascinating and surprisingly negative! We sort of want to hate the jettisoning of a coach for a mad billionaire, but um, IT'S A MAD BILLIONAIRE. Make him buy you a gigantic weight room and stadium, and then possibly a gigantic "classroom" which is really a yacht/supermodel farm/juice bar. The juice bar is NCAA approved, so that makes the rest of it just fine. [Nod. NOD, DAMN YOU.]
SURE, WE COULD USE ANOTHER VIDEO ILLUSTRATING BOTH LSU'S ON-FIELD SUPREMACY AND THEIR PR DEPARTMENT'S UNSTOPPABLE HUSTLE. This one has T.I. as the soundtrack and more inspired Les Miles yelling, but Musburger going bonkers over the deep third and short pass in the WVU game is its finest slice.
POINSETTIA BOWL SAUSAGE NECESSITIES. The eating in San Diego is pretty rustic on the whole, but the Gurgling Cod reminds you that their organic sausage game stands strong.
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