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THE CURIOUS INDEX, 11/21/2011

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RIP, GOD.

The voice was some kind of prairie cave troll's, hewn by thousands of hours in the booth and more than a little hard living. Like all great announcers, he brought his own reverb with him, and the levels were perfect without a single tweak of a knob. Even his mumbles were distinct, and his growls were always as desperate as the occasion merited. 

Larry Munson died at 89 last night of complications from pneumonia. For 41 years, he eschewed objectivity in the pursuit of saying precisely what he felt at that moment no matter how unhinged it might have been. Football--particularly UGA football, in his case---was worth breaking chairs, open loss of his faculties and invocation of God, or yelling "WHO CARES" after giving up a heartbreaking last-second touchdown. Paris was worth a mass, and beating Tennessee was worth a hobnail boot. 

His finest call (painful as it is for a Florida fan to hear) came when Lindsay Scott outraced the entire Florida defense in the 1980 Cocktail Party. Chairs are broken. Stadiums fall. You gave up, and so did he. His diction may have been his greatest and least replicable asset. Non-sequiturs fell into Georgia fan canon instantaneously, and his odd turns of phrase became cliche.

Our favorite in execution and spirit:

Man is there going to be some property destroyed tonight!

This blog takes its entire modus operandi from the creaking partisans all too happy to believe sports are, from time to time, worth the destruction of a St. Simons condo, and that objectivity is the chastity belt keeping you from happiness. Larry Munson wasn't going to be chaste for a second, and for 41 years enjoyed SEC football with the all the passion, angst, and worry of a decades-long love affair carried out to the bitter end. Would that we all finish our affairs with as much style.

AN ENTIRELY DIFFERENT KIND OF IN MEMORIAM. The Arkansas Razorbacks and surrounding community are reeling from the sudden and unexplained death of 19 year old Tight End Garrett Uekman on Sunday. Uekman was in cardiac arrest when first responders arrived on the scene at his dorm room in Fayetteville around 11:30 am yesterday. He was pronounced dead shortly afterward. Arkansas Expats broke out the Housman, and that's about all you can do at this point without answers or clues to how a 19 year old just drops dead in the prime of his physical health.

BCS RANKINGS. In really unimportant news, the BCS is now basically reduced to an SEC tiebreaker, thus allowing the SEC to finally lose a big game in the BCS by theoretically losing to itself. We watched ESPN's BCS show for the first time last night, and were revolted to find Craig James believes in a playoff system. The concept is now ritually unclean, internet: abandon it in favor of a contrary viewpoint immediately.

OH THAT'S JUST GREAT NEWS. Trent Richardson waited until the big game with Georgia Southern to talk about it, but who could blame him for hinting at a return for his senior year in Tuscaloosa. When you face the Eagles, it really forces you to bring out everything you have. (Just like facing Furman!) (/weeeeeeeeeps)

LIVER PUNCH. Connor Halliday, Wazzu's talented freshman QB, is still in the ICU with a lacerated liver he suffered at some indefinite time in the Cougars' loss to Utah on Saturday. We'd tell you he's unavailable for the Apple Cup, but you're not stupid because HOLY SHIT HE LACERATED HIS LIVER PLAYING FOOTBALL.

THAT WAS QUICK. Jimbo, FSU fans are patient and understanding. Please see Mr. Fisher's reaction (and our new permanently open bookmark) after the jump.

via The Key Play.