Hey, Will! Charlie! How'd the--
Whoa. You guys look like you didn't wear sunscreen. Floridians should know better! you guys stay chill and get some rest down there, and don't sprain anything. Pillows are in the closet if you need 'em. Gonna head inside and see how the dudes on the defense are doing. Oh, before I forget: you've really lost some ell-bees, Chuckles. No, really, lookin' hawt, bb!
Hey!
WOW. No energy in this room, boys. Just, you know...flat? Turn that frown upside down! We didn't see the game tonight, because we had these tickets to an advance screening of Real Steel, but we're sure you did just fine, right? By the way, not that any of you are asking, but those fighting robot scenes were OFF THE CHAIN! Hugh Jackman should win an Oscar for that shit. POW! Robots.
I'm gonna get you guys some Monster Energy drink and come back. Gotta go say hello to the O-line and running backs next---
WHOA. Someone left the pizza IN the box when they warmed it up. [waves smoke] Okay, everyone get low and crawl BELOW the smoke. Well, everyone except Jeff and Chris, because y'all can probably just walk out on account of being little Sonic-cheesecake-bite-sized people. Hey, where's John--
Oh god.
John?
Oh no. No, no no no no.
Um...Pitbull, help us. You are our only hope.
[takes Dr. Pepper from Pitbull]
[drinks half]
[pours remainder over John Brantley's knee]
[quietly sings "Let's Have A Real Good Time"]
[cries]