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FRESHMEN THREATEN TO TRANSFER WHEEEEE

Incoming Gator freshmen Ronald Powell and Dominique Easley, eighteen year olds, did not show up for practice on Tuesday after coaches "came down hard on them" in practice. Both allegedly mentioned transferring, though the Alligator reports that nothing's come of that yet. 

Powell and Easley are part of a "cocky" freshman class that center Mike Pouncey asked to "just shut up and play." This doesn't worry us in itself, but Easley's involvement in this does. Easley is a highly touted defensive tackle, the cursed position that is to Florida football what middle linebacker is to Tennessee football as of late, the position built over an Indian burial mound littered with the cursed potential of players who flunked out, smoked their way out of the program, or otherwise never panned out as they should/could have. If he's involved, the defensive tackle curse could kick in, and then it might require the assistance of a priest to prevent total disaster here. 

[talkradio] 

THESE GUYS NEED TO BE KICKED OFF THE TEAM AS A LESSON TO THE WHOLE TEAM AND I TELL YOU KIDS THESE DAYS NEED SOME DISCIPLINE AND LESSONS LIKE I LEARNED WHICH IS WHY I'M CALLING FROM A PHONE IN THE MIDDLE OF A WORK DAY WHEN I SHOULD BE WORKING

[/talkradio] 

It would be very nice, if this is indeed true, that everyone have a nice learning experience, acquire a few maturity points for their profile, and quietly returned to playing football. Otherwise we're calling a priest, and doing so ASAP. 

UPDATE: Deep breaths. Deep breaths. Safe place. Safe place.