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NCAA HANDS USC TICKING PACKAGE, LEAVES

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Over twenty scholarships, a two year bowl ban, and additional penalties to come when the full report is released tomorrow: USC has received the most severe punishment handed down by the NCAA since the 2002 Alabama ruling. BUT MMM THESE DONUTS ARE DELICIOUS UP HERE IN SEATTLE! OMG MAPLE BARS! I LOVE MAPLE BARS!!! 

(It's 1:50 a.m. here on the East Coast. When we wake up we're sure the Big East will have somehow conned Notre Dame into joining the conference and the SEC will have expanded to include Texas A&M and Boise State, but a man has to sleep sometime. Unless you're Pete Carroll, of course, or Lane Kiffin, last seen frantically negotiating for the Cleveland Cavaliers head coaching job.)