A chorus warms up behind the curtain. Chris Petersen and Houston Nutt take the stage to announce the Boise State/Ole Miss matchup for the 2011 season.
PR guy: And now, we'd like to let both coaches talk a little bit about this exciting non-conference matchup. Coach Nutt, please go first.
Chorus: HMMMMMMMMMMMM
A tambourine shakes. An organ plays.
Nutt: GIGGITAH to the con-gre-GAY-SHUN!
Choir: GIG-GI-TAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!
Nutt: WELLLLLL-----
Choir: WELLL----
Bass and organ: Athumpa thumpa thumpa thumpa thumpa thumpa thumpa THUMPA THUMPA thumpa thumpa thumpa thumpa thumpha thumpa...
Nutt:
Well people gonna ask
Ain't things hard enough
Coachin' and recruitin' and a keepin' it up
People gonna call Houston Nutt and say
Why you invitin' Boise State to play?
Choir:
GONNA CALL THE WAC
GONNA PAT SOME BACKS
GET THE BRONCOS COMIN AND THAT'S A FACT
Nutt:
WELL LAWDY, there's lot to do in this old world
Coachin' and recruitin' and a textin' my girl
By my girl you know that I mean my wife
YES MOST DEFINITELY I REFER TO MY WIFE
Choir:
DON'T TRY TO GUESS HIS CELL PHONE RATE
PRIVATE PHONES ONLY SINCE 2008!
Nutt:
Back from another JUCO trek
Comin' at Boise with a big ole check
Offer forty schollies and I'll offer some more
Then we'll beat the WAC and we'll beat some more!
Choir:
IT'S A SAFE BET AT HOME
IN A NON-BOWL GAME
WIN YOU GET THE CREDIT
LOSE, IT'S NO SHAME!!!
Nutt:
Don't favor us or we'll spit the bit
Underdog forever is role we don't quit
Don't need no qb, no fancy breeds
Don't believe just ask Jevan Snead!
Choir:
A QB IS FURNITURE THAT WEARS A HAT
CHECKDOWNS AND HANDOFFS, BABY THAT'S WHERE IT'S AT
The band begins to speed up.
Nutt:
Jevan Snead!
Choir:
JEVAN SNEAD!
Nutt:
Jevan Snead!
Choir:
JEVAN SNEAD!
Nutt:
THERE'S NO NEED!
Choir:
HE GONNA TAKE A BOISE STATE AT HOME
HE'S GONNA WORK 'EM LIKE A SLIDE TROMBONE
65 RECRUITS YEAH HE'S GONNA NEED
PLANT EM IN A JUCO AND HOPE THEY CAN READ
Together: OOOOHHHHHHH YEAAAAAAHAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!
Silence.
PR Guy: Thank...you...Coach Nutt, for those remarks. Have you any comments, Coach Petersen?
Chris Petersen: We're really excited about this.
FIN.