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BO PELINI HAS BEEN CHEWING THE SAME PIECE OF GUM FOR FIFTEEN YEARS. Actually, it was a piece of solid steel when he started, but he's almost got it down to a fine, rubbery consistency now. Video of this and Jet-esque opening music follow. 

Pelini says he also has no idea what swagger is during an interview. For reference, it's this on both the internet and in the dictionary.

 HE'S JUST GOING TO HANG AROUND, YOU KNOW, WORKING ON THIS NEW LAPTOP HE'S GOT. Jeremiah Masoli will stay at Oregon, enrolled in classes but not on the football team, and still open for reinstatement in 2011. Though Oregon will welcome him back with open arms in a year provided he behaves, as a bulky, laptop-stealing quarterback he may want to consider a transfer to Auburn for maximum comfort. 

MY GOD, THE SHOTGUN. Georgia Tech actually lined up in a formation they have not appeared in under the management of Paul Johnsonthe shotgun. This is new for Tech, but isn't entirely new for Johnson, who ran out of the shotgun as offensive coordinator at Hawaii and is so not impressed that you knew about it and doesn't care what you think about it. /staresatyourstupidfacewaitingforyoutosaysomething (Via.) 

WHEN FLORIDA PLAYERS COMMIT ASSAULT THE RIGHT WAY WE SMILE. GatorSports' spring practice live reports have been fantastic, though as always: BUY BACKUP BATTERIES BOYS. Running out of juice is unacceptable when thousands of page viewers are counting on you to make the trip to Best Buy and bring backup in order to post about plays that don't even count. <--dead serious.  

The best quote from yesterday's dialogue

TJ Pridemore: So, we all know you're not going to get a ton of production out of your FB, but TJ did some great lead blocking in the I today and got into his second fight of the spring.

*cartoon hearts flying around head* 

AFTER LOSING OUT AT PUNTER HE'LL HAVE TO SETTLE FOR QB. If Mitch Mustain somehow manages to go from trying out at punter to winning the allegedly open starting job at USC, we will laugh deep gusty laughs of satisfied laughter, even if nothing can soothe the ache of losing out at the punter spot Mustain tried out for last year when Aaron Corp and Barkley were ahead of him on the depth chart. It would be almost as funny as Lane Kiffin saying he learned something from Urban Meyer wait whaaaaa---

MMM HIPPY. Shakin' the Southland has your defensive back lingo presented in handy, civilian-friendly terms

THEY'RE MERELY CHILLY. See? The Big Ten isn't as icebound as you would think during football season. Would you get that spot on our back? It's March 30th, and we're working on our tan out here on the deck in Atlanta.