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FLORIDA SIGNS RONALD POWELL. LET CHILDREN RIDE ALLIGATORS

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via i9.photobucket.com

Florida's had drama over the past couple of signing days. Last year in particular was dramatic thanks to the last second jumps of Janzen Jackson and Nu'Keese Richardson, the two recruits Tennessee leaned on in an amazing run to the national championship during a convenience store robbery. Florida obviously missed them desperately this past year in going 13-1, and all the signing day teeth-gnashing was certainly worth it now wasn't it. 

After some nail-biting, Florida got the LOI from DE Ronald Powell this morning, completing the small miracle of signing 26 commits, four five star commits including Powell, shaved bears/ defensive tackles Sharrif Floyd and Dominique Easley, and the consensus number one class in the nation.  This all happened in spite of Urban Meyer's impending resignation to become the coach of the Dallas Cowboys, something that will only happen after his heart transplant and individual nut-kicking sessions with each member of the best recruiting class in the history of forever. 

In short, we Scrooge-McDuck-backstrokin' in a pit of gold coins so deep that dead leprechauns are all over the place,exhausted from the sheer amount of riches they died attempting to haul out of here. Don't dance too hard, Urban: you're not Tony Stark yet, pending the nuclear heart implant Florida donors are sending you to a secret clinic in Belize to get next week. SHOOT TO THRILL! PLAY TO KILL! TOO MANY RECRUITS AND TOO MANY PILLS!