AND IN CONCLUSION, I'D LIKE TO ASK FORGIVENESS FOR MY CRIMES, AND BOOMER SOONER! Jeffrey Landrigan, a convicted murderer executed by lethal injection last night in Arizona, will leave this earth with his last words on record being "Boomer Sooner."
"I'd like to say 'thank you' to my family for being here and all of my friends," were Landrigan's final words, according to Marson. He concluded with "Boomer Sooner," a cheer often used by University of Oklahoma fans.
There is nothing we can add further to this story that can increase its content value. THAT HAPPENED. Mack Brown would laugh, but he simply can't find a way to be driven off this picture.
If you don't haunt the halls of certain local newspapers and their webernetical sites, you're really missing out. NewsOK.com not only has Berry Tramel doing video where he looks like the Muppet-Designed-To-Embody-The-Spirit-Of-Cirrhosis, they're also on top of the latest trend stories! (Insert jokes about states where people are missing teeth.)
HARUMPH WHAT AN UNIMPRESSIVE 29 POINT WIN HARUMPH.
Boise State was a bit shaky at times in their Tuesday night matchup against Louisiana Tech, but let's grade them on several curves:
- Tuesday night game curve. Weird, off-schedule, and bound to produce some arrhythmic play.
- Fickle national fan curve. No matter what Boise did they stood to lose ground here. Blow the Bulldogs out, and your schedule is a WAC-ish layup; make a few mistakes, and suddenly it's proof you can't even hack your schedule of overgrown community college patsies.*
- The Kellen Moore Curve. He throws one pick, and it's a story. Stephen Garcia throws three, and it's called "Saturday."
WE'RE COACHING PASSING. I THINK WE ARE, AT LEAST. Overture! Hit the lights. This is it! Tonight's the night!
REPORTER: "Do you think the coaching has been good enough after four years with one, three with the other?"
MILES: "I don't know. You know, that's a tough question. The only thing I can tell you is that they've been coached and coached and coached, and drilled. The passing attack has not changed so significantly that it's not comfortable for all. I, uh, yeah, I think they've been coached."
...and ohhhh what heights we'll hiiiiiit/ On with the show/ This is iiiiiiit!
PERHAPS YOU SHOULD LISTEN TO MR. DELUCA AND HIS EXCELLENT GAMBLING ADVICE. Vegas is anything but sold on Michigan State, which may be the most clinical advice you'll get on a team that will be a sentimental favorite in most eyes after Mark Dantonio's return from a heart attack and the glossy, highlight-friendly finish against Notre Dame. Or is it all a trap to make you bet just the opposite way HMMMM? #vegasalwayswins
MARKEITH AMBLES SHOULD REALLY USE ICAL OR SOMETHING. Lane Kiffin has suspended him indefinitely for "lateness." Urban Meyer thinks this punishment is harsh.
AND BY YOUR WAR RECORD WE MEAN YOUR TIME ON THE NEBRASKA FOOTBALL TEAM. Don't ever, ever try to fudge your military record, son. And by that we do mean your time under General Osborne in the great campaigns of the 1979 and 1980 Big 8 Wars.