clock menu more-arrow no yes mobile

Filed under:


He also farted in his locker. Why people are aghast at Tim Tebow not being a unanimous choice for All-SEC qb in the preseason voting is befuddling. You know damn well who did it.

He's gonna be double mad when he sees what Kiffykins did to his car in the parking lot!

Now with vitamin C(ontext) Since you'll likely see the quote about how Urban Meyer says Utah likely couldn't survive the grind of the SEC, and how uncharitable this is toward his former team, let us wheel out the rest of the quote for you to see that there is context to the quote, that Urban Meyer's not a total dick toward his old employers, and that he ends up crediting the Utes in the end:

"But there are other conferences out there who can't survive the grind, either. I can't disagree. I don't know if I'm supposed to say that or not. I certainly listen to them because I know them and I know their coach (Kyle Whittingham). To tell me he's not a BCS coach or those aren't BCS players, that's not true."

Florida hasn't survived the SEC unscathed in his tenure, and we have two national titles. The man says that out of hard experience. He also refers to the 9-4 2007 team as "terrible" in the article, something we'd like to thank him for after pulling out our left eyeball during the Capital One Bowl. (The new glass eye, though, can hold two shots of vodka, and is handy for winning bar bets. Thanks, Chad Henne!)

If he'd chop blocked like he asked him to, this wouldn't have happened. Chaz Ramsey, a former Auburn offensive lineman, is suing for the NFL money he would have earned had he not gone to Auburn, gotten intimidated back into the weight room when he was injured, and thus suffered further injuries that ended his playing career. Considering the odds, this is like you suing your eighth grade math teacher for hindering your dreams of becoming an astronaut, when your own lacking analytical abilities are more likely to blame. The wrinkle is that Ramsey isn't suing Auburn, but is instead focusing on trucking executive and former line coach Hugh Nall and trainer Arnold Gamber. Bold thinking that won't get him a dime in the lawsuit, but the legal innovation and sheer balls has to earn some golf claps from the Category Fivers in the audience today.

BTW, if our eighth grade math teacher is reading this right now, we hope you're doing it on a 64K modem through a veil of flames in hell itself.

It will improve your defense, spice up your love life, and take three strokes off your golf game. The Solid Verbal podcast features the only person who thinks about NCAA Football more than you, Russ Kiniry, the designer of the game who's just handing out free advice on how not to get humiliated at the hands of 13 year olds when you play the preseason's most necessary of addictions.

Let's leave the football field out of this. The desecration of the sacred acre is objectionable, but the style is undeniable.