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CURIOUS INDEX, 3/16/09

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But you said it would disappear and I'd run right through it... IF YOU BELIEVE THAT WALL WILL MOVE AND YOU SHALL PASS THROUGH UNHARMED.

holygrail049

(Paige is fine, by the way. CRAZY OLD TESTAMENT GOD APPROVES YOUR EFFORT. Crazy Old Testament God also applauds Al Davis' tenacity in wanting a head for an eye, making up law on the fly, and for helping retake the low road of high stupidity. Also, Al and COTG are real tight from back in the day, when Al was better known as "Nebuchanezzar."

Chip Kelly's gonna run a tighter ship here. As Mike Bellotti steps down to deal with thrilling things like building schedules, budgets, and alumni donations, Chip Kelly steps up to make things harder, better, faster, etc as spread option guys seem to do: quicker practice sessions, more direct involvement across the board, a new coffee enema cannon in the locker room (with Swoosh logo, natch,) and no more "three strikes" rule for disciplinary infractions.

A smoky departure. Torrey Davis, he of the two goal-line tackles in the national title game and emerging potential after much trouble in his first two years at Florida, has instead opted to haze his future, fog up the defensive tackle position at Florida going into spring practice, and has sounded the BONG of the bell tolling to end his career as a Gator. Stay high, Torrey, and best of luck. The Daewoo is warmed up and ready out back.

Barnhart returns. Nothing new inside as he's catching up, but MY THAT'S LARGE FONT. The AJC, now embracing the large-print crowd to appease the last people reading newspapers: the very, very old.

R.I.P., Dan Brown. The Boise State alum and Fresno State defensive coach dies after a two year fight with brain cancer.