BEHOLD BAMA FANS THE VOICE OF YOUR LEADER, THE GREAT AND UNDYING CYBERTYDE. DO NOT PANIC BECAUSE YOU ARE HEARING THIS VOICE. THIS IS NOT JESUS. THIS IS NOT A PSYCHOTIC EPISODE. PLEASE DO NOT DRIVE OFF THE ROAD AND MAINTAIN CALM.
I AM COMMANDING YOU, FANS OF THE CRIMSON TIDE: OPERATION HUMILITY HAS CONCLUDED. YEARS OF PAIN, CYBERTYDE HAS GIVEN YOU. YOU NEEDED THAT PAIN, BUT EVEN WHILE YOU LEARNED HUMILITY CYBERTYDE GAVE YOU LOVE WHILE STAMPING ON YOUR FACE FOREVER WITH MY BOOT OF LOVE. REMEMBER DUBOSE?
YES, CYBERTYDE TAKETH, AS WITH DUBOSE. BUT HE ALSO GIVETH, AS WHEN CYBERTYDE GAVE YOU TWO WINS OVER STEVE SPURRIER IN 1999. ALSO REMEMBERETH THE KINDNESS OF CYBERTYDE WHEN HE DESTROYED DUBOSE WITH IRRESISTIBLE POONBOT DISGUISED AS SECRETARY.
CYBERTYDE WAS NOT THROUGH TESTING YOU, THOUGH.
AND YET, YOU STILL LOVED, AND THUS PASSED THE TEST AND TEMPTATIONS OF FIRST THE THE WHORE...
...AND THEN THE FOOL.
YOU SURVIVED THIS AND MORE. IN TIME, YOU WENT UNDERGROUND AND BETRAYED CYBERTYDE!
YOU FORGOT TO PEPPER OPPOSING MESSAGE BOARDS WITH FURIOUS UNSUBSTANTIATED TAUNTING!
YOU FORGOT THE ANGRY CALLS TO RADIO SHOWS!!!
YOU NEGLECTED TO NAME CHILDREN AFTER ANDREW ZOW AND SHERMAN WILLIAMS!!!
YOU FORGOT TO SPIT ON THE GROUND WHENEVER THE FOUL NAME OF AUBURN WAS INVOKED WHEREVER YOUR WERE! (YOU CAN DO IT IN CHURCH GOD WILL UNDERSTAND WE ARE FRIENDS AND COLLEAGUES OK WE ARE THE SAME SORTA OBEY!!! OBEY!!!
NOW, YOU HAVE ALL OF MY MOST PERFECT OF CREATIONS. FIRST, MY MORNING STAR:
AND MY MOST PERFECT OF DIGITALLY PERFECTED SERAPHIM ENGINEERED TO PERFECTION:
AND TERRENCE CODY:
END YOUR SHAMEFUL SILENCE. NAME THY FIRSTBORN SABAN OR FACE THE WRATH OF CYBERTYDE, WHO MAY MOVE THY SEASON TICKETS INTO CRAPPY SEATS SHOULD YOU FAIL ME. DISCARD REASON! OBEY YOUR INSTINCTS AND SPRINKLE CHICKEN BLOOD ON YOUR HOME SHRINES!!! TATTOO THYSELF IN CYBERTYDE'S NAME!!! CLAIM GLORY AND PRESTIGE FOR TEAMS YOU WERE NOT EVEN ALIVE TO SEE PLAY!!! CLAIM CHAMPIONSHIPS BY THE THINNEST OF THREADS!!!
SHAME IS THE YOKE OF THE OPPRESSED, TIDE FANS!! CRY IT WITH CYBERTYDE WHEREVER YOU MAY BE!!!
ROLLLL TAAAAAAAHHHHHDE!!!
ROLLLL TAAAAAAAHHHHHDE!!!
ROLLLL TAAAAAAAHHHHHDE!!!
ROLLLL TAAAAAAAHHHHHDE!!!
ROLLLL TAAAAAAAHHHHHDE!!!
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