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ALL HAIL THE ALPHABETICAL, BCS RANKINGS, MASS HYSTERIA

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The Alphabetical is up in all its glory. We think the letters are all there. More importantly, the BCS has decided that the criteria for valuation is who wins biggest and last, because Oklahoma is above Texas in the fresh rankings, and will therefore get the shot at a Big 12 Championship this week. You go ahead and just let that outrage out, you outraged person, you.

If Oklahoma somehow loses to Missouri--probability ZERO but we state it for the record anyway--then all blazing, many-tentacled hell breaks loose. Until then, welcome your new/old overlord Bob Stoops. Get your Vanessa Carlton on like it's 2002 all over again!