ORSON (Nashvll):
Penn State @ Iowa
Florida @ Vandy, live if’n he can manage tickets. Help him manage tickets, America. He will buy you drinks. WATCH THE GAME WITH ORSON SWINDLE! Operators are standing by.
OK State @ Texas Tech
HOLLY (LA, but not the fun LA):
Baylor @ Texas
Wyoming @ Tennessee
Alabama @ LSU
Cincinnati @ West F. Virginia
California @ USC
OK State @ Texas Tech
Florida @ Vandy
Evil Nine’s death-defying new album: In hands and ears across America, if you know what’s good for you. Black Dennis Franchione thinks it’s the mad notes, but don’t let that stop you. CONSUME.
Crucial schedule and coverage maps: Hyah. Your own agendas: Below. Another glorious fall weekend: Begun.
HOLLY, QUASI-RATIONAL: Relax your bedtime grip on your Glocks, America. Ohio State has two losses, and the universe can breathe easy, safe from the specter of a third-straight Buckeyes champblahblahblahBig10bashing. Statistically, these teams are surprisingly well-matched, but….look, we’d all love to pick Northwestern, adorably ranked after a victory over Minnesota, but if pluck guaranteed wins, we’d be celebrating the single-digit ranking of Texas Christian (HOW DARE YOU PUSH US TO ACCEPT UTAH AS A LEGIT TEAM, HORNED FROGS).
ORSON, IRRATIONAL. The force is strong in the young one…
…but this is episode five, and he loses his hand to the Dark Lord.
Baylor at #4 Texas
ORSON, QUASI-RATIONAL. If Baylor had the chops on defense to hold Colt McCoy in check, we’d happily tiptoe over to the pond of tribute bets and salute Art Briles and Robert Griffin for revivifying Baylor football. (more…)
Regret nothing, dive in, and enjoy Holly’s Yahoo! column on Baton Rouge and the sights and sounds offered therein. We’ll be in Nashville this weekend, but our hearts and a good chunk of our liver will be in Baton Rouge, which after our baptism last year remains our favorite place to be called “a fucking faggot” for wearing Florida gear.
Just make sure you get the bus driver free and clear of the bus before you tip Saban over. He’s just picking up a paycheck, and has nothing to do with this.
Our dream of batter-frying our cellphone remains alive, so next year we’ll have to do it again.
This is Warrick Dunn in college. We never really believed he was as little as he looked.
We saw Warrick Dunn at Eats in Midtown Atlanta once. Eats is the kind of place that serves four things, charges somewhere between five and eight dollars for all of it, and serves their beverages in old red Pizza Hut tumblers. Glamorous, it is not.
It took a second to recognize him, but not from the face: same aquiline nose, big eyes, close-cropped hair and neatly trimmed goatee. He has an unmistakable face that we’re unafraid to say is nigh-man-pretty. It was his physique that didn’t jibe. An NFL player should have been bigger than he was, if not in height-he came up to my eyebrows, and I’m 5′11″-but in weight, with some sort of Barry Sanders bulge to his legs and shoulders, at least.
Yet, waiting in line at Eats, the dude looked no bigger than a UPS guy, a pocket-sized person in a baggy sweater and jeans. The idea that he blocked the John Randles of the world and took direct shots from NFL linebackers without dying still stuns the mind.
Warrick Dunn actually visited the man who confessed to killing his mother in prison. Here’s an excerpt.
As I looked at this man who I never met, I bared my soul to him. I told him how in the years after my mom’s death I had been hesitant about being in a committed relationship, how I’ve been afraid to lose people. I’ve been in counseling for many years over this very concept of having a true committed relationship because I don’t want to lose somebody I love twice in my life. I don’t think I can do it. I don’t think I could suffer that pain again.
When you’re made of steel, size is irrelevant. Read the rest here. It’s dusty in here.
TCU chokes on the pork rind of opportunity. TCU gave up an 80 yardish drive, gave up a touchdown to Utah late, and coughed up not only another chance to crash the BCS, but also a shot at the Mountain West title. This hurts especially because of the co-ownership of the 2008 Pac-10 they would have gotten, as well. The deed to the Song Girls goes to Utah; use them well.
The final drive may be seen below. Brian Johnson looks brilliant, and he should, as he looked like a plate of cold ass for most of the game.
Your fate is in the hands of San Diego State you sir are dead. Boise State’s BCS hopes took pipe last night, as they now need help from BYU or San Diego State to get into the rotation.
Drew Weatherford is getting bitchmade. Drew Weatherford respects the coaches’ decision to bench him, but he doesn’t, because he still thinks he deserves to be starter. (If you’d like to do your best Drew Weatherford impression, take a snap from center, run ten yards to your right in a dead panic sprint, and then throw into double coverage.) Also, Florida State has three players suspended for the weekend. Woo.
“Son, we don’t like how you didn’t wear a tie.” Mike Leach may be on Tennessee’s short list, but do not count on him making it as a finalist. Leach has interviewed at other jobs before, and it inevitably ends when Leach acts as Leach does and the suits in the room begin to hesitate about giving someone that interesting the reins to their multimillion dollar enterprise. If there’s one place with an allergy to weird, it’s Tennessee. Unpleated pants are probably cause for being pulled over there.
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Orson Swindle and Stranko Montana are two men pushing thirty who should know better than to run a college football blog, but evidently don't. Both graduated from the University of Florida, and both agree that college football is far too important to be left to the professionals.
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