CURIOUS INDEX, 7/22/2008

We, for ourselves, welcome our new quote overlord Les Miles.

From the Wiz: Les Miles takes the Spurrier crown for pithy press conference pissantry.

There was no question the attendees still bask in last November's victory over former LSU head coach and Tide boss Nick Saban, and Miles brought down the house when he urged the faithful "not to make too much of that game as it seems like a lot of teams in Louisiana beat that team," referencing Alabama's shocking subsequent loss to Louisiana-Monroe.

Well-struck, you game hunter, you. Pic from Les Miles Classics thread at TigerDroppings.

I hate you. No, you can't hear why I do. George O'Leary and the rest of the UCF football staff aren't talking to the Orlando Sentinel, citing "inaccuracies" in the paper's coverage of Ereck Plancher's death. Which ones? O'Leary won't say, which is a neat trick scammed from the angry preschooler playbook. Nappies and some time with Dora the Explorer required immediately.

Pretty soon, he's gettin' a Flowbee so he doesn't have to worry about haircuts, neither. Al Groh likes the ACC's move to provide suggested biweekly injury reports. Why? Because it saves you bugging his ass, of course.

"I don't have any problem with it," says Virginia coach Al Groh. "That means I don't have to answer those stupid questions during the week."

Al Groh, of course, has always hated football, and is the guy in all commercials who really is tired of the simple task a superfluous gadget can save you the trouble of doing.

If any other conferences adopt the practice, let us hope it's the SEC who goes first just so Urban Meyer can ape his BFF Bill Belichick by completely fabricating every single inch of the thing. Listen for our audible laughter if this happens as we read "Percy Harvin; headbone; probablish" on a future report.

Our colleague Dave Curtis dittoes calls for Ferentz's resignation, though he's skeptical; given the pattern thus far at Iowa, what makes anyone think Ferentz won't get the chance to plausibly deny and then coach the upoming season?

It's never too early to enrage your opponent.A sport for all seasons, really: Notre Dame commit Cierre Wood is already taunting his future rivals from the comfort of a high school.

"We are going to be good and Notre Dame football will be back. And I guarantee that we will beat USC the next three years."

Rey heard that. Fake your own death immediately. There's ways, you know, of doing these things.