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So as not to forget, as we did last Wednesday: our Mustache Wednesday comes courtesy of reader Jason, who is to credit and blame for making you all see this.

Happy Mustache Wednesday, motherfuckers!

This is Connery from Zardoz, a 1974 bomb directed by John Boorman featuring this actual line of dialogue:

The penis is evil. The penis shoots seeds, and makes new life, and poisons the earth with a plague of men, as once it was. But the gun shoots death, and purifies the earth of the filth of brutals. Go forth and kill!

Screenwriters: they're professionals! Don't fuck with their "craft," or risk spoiling the next Anaconda or The Notebook. We like Ryan Gosling so much better when he's smoking crack in between inspirational English classes.