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One of the principals in the ongoing poop-fight over Rich Rodriguez's contract buyout, Mike Garrison, is resigning as the president of West Virginia University. In addition to earning the enmity of football boosters by (in their eyes, at least) dicking around DickRod, he also handed out an MBA to the governor's daughter. This would have been just fine if she'd taken the coursework and passed all the classes, which inconveniently for Garrison, she had not.

If you would like an MBA from WVU, Garrison should be in his office for the next few hours. Be sure to mention a fictional position of power potentially beneficial to him: we recommend calling with a fake accent and identifying yourself as "The Sultan of Glutan," who is not only interested in financing a pro-smoking sci-fi picture starring Brad Pitt, but also has an open position at the University of Glutan waiting for him.

Football probably didn't have everything to do with this, but to suggest the Rodriguez scandal didn't have something to do with it would be as dumb as, say granting a university degree or admission to school based on the cheap calculus of political favors. (For more fun in this department, see the blowup referenced here at our own alma mater. Florida's gay governor wants well-connected doctors, dammit!)