Quick! Cheesecake before the weekend in the form of Ladies of Science Fiction. Apologies of the lack of Natasha Henstridge: we could not find a picture of her where she was not completely naked and/or disemboweling someone with her alien tentaclejaws.
Carrie Fisher in a metal bikini. Natch.
Proof of the value of a good outfit: Fisher was not that hot, per se, but rather on a leash and scantily clad. Fucked up two generations of young men who destroyed countless drapes, hangers, and soldering irons attempting to craft identical outfit for spouse.
Monday’s piece dealing with booster concerns in Knoxville over player discipline reported that Tennessee punter Britton Colquitt has been ordered to hand-wash coach Phillip Fulmer’s car after repeated alcohol-related violations. Colquitt is to wash Coach Fulmer’s wife’s car. Additionally, a quote from Florida coach Urban Meyer calling the punishment “harsh” was not included. We regret the error and the omission.
Tuesday’s “Players who have never, ever, ever smoked marijuana EVER” piece listed Ryan Perrilloux as one of “college football’s most stalwart anti-reefer crusaders struggling to save youth from the smoky stinking menace of cannabis.” We are obviously wrong here, and we regret the error.
An interview with Mark Richt credited the Georgia head coach’s unnaturally taut and shiny complexion to candle wax drippings. Coach Richt favors paraffin to keep his pores filled and shimmering. We regret the error
Shiny!
On Thursday we mentioned that Chris Fowler had dropped to a 4-day low of 0.9203 against the Indonesian rupiah in early Asian trading on Monday, and that the rupiah-Fowler pair was worth 0.9178 at Friday’s close. (more…)
You have your choices in life. You can take prissy mulleted Bono with the sleeveless t-shirt, the prissy Joshua Tree Bono, or gonzo Fly-goggle prissy Bono. Either way, U2 made one song and only one song passing the muster for “sounding like a bombing run put through an amplifier,” and we choose gonzo prissy Bono to deliver it.
RUN! INTO THE ARMS! OF TIMTEBOWRICA! Or something like that. That bass line still sounds like angry devastation on stilts to us.
SURRENDER BEGINS IN LOWER CASE. Now here’s a political candidate we can get behind. The minute you stop writing upper case YOU SURRENDER!
Dick: grew. We thought with the sadness of the Orgeron leaving, this blog would shrivel to an undersized, flaccid organ of the evil, dedicated-to-cruelty online media. Ah, but thanks to Bobby Petrino and Casey Dick, we have a new swelling of pride that’s got the whole neighborhood talking.
Dick, who has consistently been one of the SEC’s most inaccurate passers the last couple of years, will be depended on heavily.
“He grew tremendously in the spring,” Petrino said of Dick.
It’s the Enzyte offense, and it’s here to penetrate your offense like nothing you’ve ever seen before. They’ll go deep. They’ll work the middle and the sidelines. They’ll go up the middle with power before-gotcha-shocking you by exploding all over the backfield with sweeps. We can do this for the next 14 months or so if you like and it will never, never get old. Not to us, at least.
AAAHGGG, MAH CONFEDRUT VIKTRY FARR-STIX! Georgia moves to ban smoking at Sanford Stadium. Cancer is a democratic right, dammit.
Perhaps the only time the Economist will be linked here: Buzz, newspapers aren’t just dying because they suck. They’re also dying because the economy sucks, too.
Nick Saban shall not be published. Football Diet went to Nick Saban’s Huntsville booster visit and heard this:
He was clearly not happy with the published reports of his private comments during his Crimsom Revival stops at Dothan and Talladega earlier last week and this week; he told the media present that if he saw his visit mentioned or if any of his remarks were printed or recorded in any form, he would not return to Huntsville to speak again.
The reefer man post was angling for Perrilloux rumors confirmation. None needed: the AP is reporting that Perrilloux is gone at last, having set fire to Les Miles house, eaten his dog, and then flossing his teeth with Mrs. Miles gold tennis bracelets failed a drug test, according to our sources.
This means that Perrilloux didn’t just fail one test, of course: at Florida back in the 90s, Jason Williams failed no fewer than ten tests before he got the boot. We suspect the same range of drug testing leniency applied to the immensely talented AND stupid Perrilloux, as in RYAN WE ARE TESTING YOU IN A WEEK HERE’S SOME GOLDENSEAL AND A JUG OF WATER MIGHT WANT TO USE THESE HINT HINT HINT.
Good luck, sixty motherfucking million dollar man! It was fun knowing you. With Perrilloux, LSU was starting the season at the forty fucking yard line.
Without him, they’re on the 20 with everyone else at best.
Oh, no reason to post this video. Nothing to do with a particularly important college football player getting the boot from his team due to a failed drug test. No: we’re just huge Cab Calloway fans, that’s all.
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Orson Swindle and Stranko Montana are two men pushing thirty who should know better than to run a college football blog, but evidently don't. Both graduated from the University of Florida, and both agree that college football is far too important to be left to the professionals.
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