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JOE KINES RETURNS. YAW YAW.

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The inside trout returns! Get yur yaw yaw on!

Texas A&M becomes massively awesomer than they were five seconds ago with the hiring of former Alabama defensive coordinator Joe Kines. For those not familiar with Kines, he rules in many ways:

1. Designs simple but effective defenses for the college game.
2. Implements them well.
3. Has been coaching since the Nixon administration.
4. Swallowed a bullhorn in a barfight in 1979, and can only speak in two ways: at high volume, or in the siren noise that is the other option on most bullhorns.

He is one of the loudest coaches ever, and he's perfect for the Big 12, where he will face the inside trout yearly when A&M plays Oklahoma State.