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BLOOD BALLS YAY BLOOD BALLS

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Buckeye Commentary spots a great Kirk Barton quote from why tOSU took particular savor from their victory in Happy Valley against the Penn State Saturday. It all comes down to one thing: don't mess with the band.

"Real quick before I go on, I just want to say we dedicated this to our band, well, that's something I came up with because they couldn't come back after they had like piss bombs and blood balls thrown at them last year, so this is for our band. It's not all Penn State fans, it only takes a couple, but it spoils the whole experience of college football for our band. Just let them know we're thinking about them (the band)."

Don't waste blood balls, kids. Also: remember to pay your taxes.

Blood balls? Dear god...we know that blood balls had a deep and enduring role in the traditions of college football, but sweet jesus, what kind of savage throws them? They should be cherished for what they are and their unique roles at each school, not tossed willy-nilly at the band like so many loose bolts and broken glass.

At LSU, they fry them; at Miami, they throw them at chalk outlines to prevent investigations from proceeding (no snitching!); at Tennessee they feed them to Phil; at Ole Miss, they throw them at Ed Orgeron, who wears a loincloth and carries a flamethrower around campus on Thursdays just to send a message to the world. At Wisconsin they drink them, since the prevailing BAC in Madison is high enough to qualify blood balls as high-gravity beer; at Washington, Ty Willingham uses them as golf balls on the driving range, where he is the ball two to three hours a day, not the club. In

But throwing them? Please. Blood balls are too precious a commodity for mere band-baiting. That's what piss-bombs are for, and West Virginia fans will be more than happy to send someone for a train-the-trainer session in that.