We can’t believe he’s never been knighted in this spot before-and my, that sounds wrong considering the subject of this piece-but Freddie Mercury is our Mustache Wednesday Mustache of the Day.

You had us at Flash, sir, when Mom and Dad arrived home with the Empire Strikes Back and Flash Gordon soundtracks. Everything else was really just gravy after that.

Ladies and gentleman, the Prancing Pop Prince of Persia and his moustache: Freddie.

A truly magnificent dick-duster on a truly magnificent singer: Freddie Mercury. Happy Mustache Wednesday, motherfuckers!

Continue the rock with Freddie’s gayest video of all gay videos after the jump-and that is a degree of gayness you can’t possibly approach, even trapped on the event horizon of a black hole with Liberace, Terry from Reno 911, and Jake Shears from the Scissor Sisters. (more…)

According to our rubber-chicken eating, Gator Club-due-payin’ sources, Florida president Bernie Machen dropped the unsurprising word that Florida AD Jeremy Foley would receive a new contract from the university. This may be less a compliment to Foley than an act of constitutional law, since we’re pretty sure that “extending a bountiful contracte in lighte of fucceff unforefeen in thee form of fucceffive titlef of the nation” is taken directly from the Articles section of our national charter.

Foley has overseen l’age d’or of Florida Athletics: two football title, two basketball titles, ran the Boston Marathon in 3:28:10, hired Urban Meyer, ten national titles in all, and once actually answered a personal email from us re: [NAME REDACTED]. (All that and time to appear in Dante’s Peak, the second-best volcano movie of the ’90s.) Give him screaming live babies to be turned into sausage if he likes.

He deserves every last tasty link of Meef he requests. Bow before his mighty incisors.

Well, there’s a reason right there: Jeremy Foley, with his accomplice in the art of gettin’ mad payeeeed.

Blogtoberfest! It’s like Hammerfest, but warmer, and not located in Norway.

BULLET BULLET BULLET This may be the second-worst piece of news we’ve heard this week:

Larry Munson, an integral piece to the lore of Sanford Stadium on fall Saturdays, discussed the possibility of retiring with Georgia athletics director Damon Evans in an extended meeting Tuesday morning.

All of your announcers suck dirty tailpipe in comparison to Larry Munson, the voice of Georgia football and gravelly dean of college announcers. That includes Florida’s own Mick Hubert, who lives several thousand zip codes away from the awesomeness of Munson territory. For all that is holy and kickass, we can only pray Munson hangs on another year, even though he’s 84 and admits he wasn’t in game shape until the Auburn game last season.

Sample the gravelly greatness below.

Will Collier sez keep an eye on Hoover High, Birmingham-area football factory and backdrop for the MTV series Two-A-Days. Take any and all rumors of academic eligibility in the Yellowhammer State with ample salt, especially when it could involve Alabama recruits targeted by Auburn, or Auburn recruits targeted by Alabama.

Bear Meat answers last night’s four questions from EDSBS Live, and finds a picture that sums up all you need to know about Baylor football ever. Nobels have to be kept in stock for fans like Red, who pull for teams knowing full well fate is going to slap them in the face with the cold, clammy, and unforgiving Red Snapper of truth.

Kirk Herbstreit couldn’t beat Clucky the Chicken in college football prognostication last year, a categorical defeat possibly prompting his admission that he was “an idiot” last year (more…)

Hang the copy editor! In an article about the difficulties of ever scheduling the currently defunct Pitt/Penn State series again, a copy editor phones it in, but not from a land line, and most definitely not from a crystal clear VOIP connection. Think derelict satellite phone transmission from Mauritania-level phone in:

Copy editor not optimisitc about chances of keeping current job.

The game, according to Paterno, has little chance of fitting into the economics of a 12 game season, meaning they don’t want to lose guaranteed home games and the attendant wash of ticket money that comes with cupcake beatdowns in front of applauding, bloodthirsty crowds. Pitt and Penn State have played 96 times in total, but not once since 2000.

College football: the only sport where more games means less actual competition!