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What: EDSBS LIVE online radio.

Click here to join the show!

Why listen? Because the Deadliest Catch doesn't come on until after the show, and because we'll be discussing the Big 12, America's rootin', tootin'-est conferences. To keep the regional theme constant, we'll be handing out fried Snickers and toilet bowl meth...very, very politely, mind you.

Where: At NowLive, where you can chat with each other and the show hosts throughout the broadcast in the online forum (which remains damn lively). To phone in to the show, just call (310) 984-7600.

Who: Tonight's special guests are Chip Brown from the Dallas Morning News and Seth J from Double T Nation (Texas Tech). Guaranteed bonus Mike Leach pirate discussion should be enough, but we'll throw in a real journalist just for the hell of it.

Four Questions: As always, our four questions for the night.

1. Who emerges atop the Big 12 scrum this year? Oklahoma State. The offense has Bobby Reid pulling strings, Larry Fedora calling plays sans shoestrings (even with them he did a fine job at Florida), and a nice upward trend from 4-7 to 7-6 last year. A young coach, improved defense, and no one looking out for them all strike the eye as fetching, like a comely lass in a parasol we'd like to buy a sarsparilla for at the park.

(Anyone with any brains will pick Oklahoma or Texas. But that's not us, and you know it.)

2. Now take it a step further. Does the winner of the Big 12 play for the BCS Title game this year? Sure, if there's not an undefeated Big East team, who would face a one-loss LSU or Pac-10 team. Oklahoma may have a slight edge, since Texas would have the shameful pygmy heads of Arkansas State, UCF, and Rice as trophies in an undefeated scenario, weak nancies, all of 'em. At least the Sooners could claim Miami (FL), even in year one under Randy Shannon, which would give them a slight SOS advantage.

Then again, Texas could claim Oklahoma if they won...which is why the strongest candidate would be an undefeated Oklahoma State team, since they could have Georgia's scalp on their resume, too, provided UGA sleepwalks through their opener as they're wont to do from time to time, along with Oklahoma and Texas, too. They'd be the strongest candidate, but again, since we've picked them it ain't happening.

One albatross, however: human beings still being a factor here, Oklahoma will suffer for crapping out against USC and LSU in recent BCS championships, no matter the circumstances. People have short memories, but they have 'em, fair or not.

3. If I paid you $500,000 would you permanently move to Nebraska? If not, what's the threshhold? $1,000,000? $10m? For how long would you move to Nebraska for $500,000? For $500K, we would sleep in an open pasture in Nebraska for a year. That's 500 large, there. As long as the pasture had wireless, we would be fine. Which in all likelihood means we wouldn't do it.

4. Because our show is so dependent on juvenile humor, the obligatory sex question: What's the sexiest mascot in the Big 12?

We go pirate, of course, but only because the words "Pirate Fetish Machine" beg to be used in a band name, tattoo, or novel title.

You'll never look at Baylor the same way.

Talk to you tonight.