clock menu more-arrow no yes mobile

Filed under:

NIU UNKNOWN "ROY SMITH" PREPARES FOR SENIOR BOWL

Has Florida chased Troy Smith into the witness protection program? Perhaps. That's Smith in an NIU helmet, though our Senior Bowl correspondent says otherwise. HT: Kenny.

MOBILE, AL--We've never heard of him. Hell, he's not even on NIU's roster. Dark horse Roy Smith, though, impressed scouts with his accuracy on Monday, boosting his draft status and becoming a dark horse pick for the NFL draft thanks to his performance in Senior Bowl practices.


TRoy Smith wows the scouts at the Senior Bowl practices.

"I'm just trying to break in, you know, show people that I can still--I mean, that I throw the ball well, even though, you know, people haven't seen me play much. Because I went to NIU, you know, and didn't even start. It's just all so crazy at this point."

Smith paused. "And that's truth...cuz."

Smith says he's amazed by the attention he's gotten thus far.

"I mean, maybe it's because I look like Troy Smith, and our names sound the same, and we even resemble each other. I would like to point out that they measured me at six feet tall, though. That's six feet even. Um, yo."

Senior Bowl coach John Gruden thinks he may have the steal of the draft in the unheralded mystery qb.

"It's astonishing just how Troy Smith-esque he really is. He even sounds like him, just with this crazy, almost fake sounding southern thug accent he's got. If I didn't know better, I'd assume this guy was actually Troy Smith faking an identity and "skipping" the Senior Bowl in order to boost his flagging draft status."

Gruden laughed, then paused. "But when you've got Chris Simms and Bruce Gradkowski on your depth chart as the main course, I don't care if this guy calls himself Nancy Cockswax and wears a Vera Wang when he's on the field. We need help. I mean, Chris Simms, Jesus," he said, muttering and turning away from the cameras and toward the field.

Smith denied any connection between him and Troy Smith. He also denied ever being in Glendale, Arizona. He did admit to hearing of Florida, and even recognized the names of defensive ends Jarvis Moss and Derrick Harvey, though he had less than complimentary words for them.

"Flaming marys, both of 'em from what I hear. Homie. Did you see how offsides they were the whole time? That guy Troy Smith...my God, if he were hear I'd tell him how much of a man he was, and how shafted he got by his bustass wide receivers and the refs. And what was the band doing playing Titanic? They should have played something else...like...(at this point Smith looks down at an index card with some writing on it)...'Throw some D's' by the Rich Boy. That's how we roll where I'm from. Which is definitely not Cleveland."

Roy Smith says: "Yes, like that downhome jam from wherever I'm from down south says, every girl should have a picture of my dick on their wall."