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COWS IN WOMEN'S UNDERWEAR: DESPERATE TIMES AT THE TEXAS BOWL

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Rutgers ended the season badly by dropping two (TWO!?!) games, sinking to a miserable 10-2 previously unheard of at Rutgers--unheard of because they haven't gone 10-2 or anything close since 1976, when they were rolling over the Colgates of this world on they way to an 11-0 record of dubious merit.

The Texas Bowl won't shine the beltbuckle of too many Rutgers fans on its own merits. While other teams rip down Lowe's Motor Speedway at 180 mph or even go "south of the border" (WOO!!! Donkey show for you, student-athlete!), the boys from Rutgers are in Houston throwing shit around and dressing up cows in underwear. Literally.

Players from Rutgers gamely participated in the rodeo bowl, a competition involving roping, dung-tossing and dressing cattle in women’s underwear.

At Kansas State, this constitutes dating. Wocka-wocka! ZING! ZOWEE!!! Our favorite quote from the whole article, though, comes late in the piece:

Off to one side, a rodeo instructor named Dick Hudgins tried to improve the accuracy of Mike Teel, the starting quarterback for Rutgers. When Teel made an errant toss with his lasso, Hudgins asked him, "You’re not a quarterback, are you?" Teel did not respond.

Sign that man to a scouting contract--now.


No cowboy: Mike Teel, bad with a lasso.