Brent Schaeffer, the starting quarterback for Ole Miss and College of the Sequoias transfer who has yet to actually appear at Ole Miss, finally finished the American History crossword he was working on and has completed the coursework allowing him to transfer to Oxford. (Helpful reminder: Austill.) Orgeron may breathe a sigh of relief now, and release Schaeffer's family from the undersea prison/mountain lair/backwater stilthouse in the swamp he's been holding them in for the past month or two.
Starting qb + one month of practice prior to season = mandatory comedy watching for first four games, especially the unusually feisty Memphis Tigers in game one. Cue the wacky blooper music from the Sport Machine. Hey-OOO!!!
"Snap the ball, or I'll crap a set of brass knuckles right now and beat you all to death with them."