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Like NCAA: 2007 wasn't going to leave you penniless and selling your ass on the streets to begin with. Nathan unearths this bit of helpful, doom-filled information:

But if you're looking for maybe the biggest change in the series, all you need to do is open the playbooks. I'm talking about the biggest playbook overhaul in the history of the series. Tiburon hired two offensive gurus who watched at least three games of every team, then went in and personalized each and every playbook. There are 102 new formations in the game (86 on offense, 16 on defense), including the spread offense that includes option runs to the WR, the double slant and go, the post stop, the Nevada Pistol formation (QB stands 3 yards deep with a RB directly behind him)…there are so many new plays, it's almost overwhelming (to the point you'll get called for delay of game while cycling through all the new hotness).

If, in the E! True Hollywood Story of the life of Orson Swindle, they need to point to a moment leading to our eventual demise in a garbage can on skid row in Tulsa, this may be it.

Because he can't put down the controller, son. Because he can't put it down.