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FULMER CUP:...AND THEY'RE ON THE BOARD!!!

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Something didn't seem right. We'd pour the coffee, and it tasted...off. On our morning walk to our job at the tollbooth, the flowers smelled less sweet than they should. In fact, the sun seemed to hang at a strange angle in the sky, as if the entire world were askew on its axis.

Fortunately, we walked out this morning and Mr. Sun was floating proudly in his proper spot, since Tennessee finally scored points in the competition named after their fat coach, the Fulmer Cup. Senior middle linebacker Marvin Mitchell was arrested for disorderly conduct at the Rocky Top Market around 3:15 in the morning on Monday morning, where...

Police said when they arrived to disperse a disruptive crowd early Monday morning at the market, they heard Mitchell shouting and swearing at another customer near the front door.

According to the UT police report, Mitchell threatened to "knock the customer out."

Sensing that an altercation was about to occur, police told Mitchell to leave and noticed a strong odor of alcohol on his breath.

We'll guess that Sunday evening was a brown liquor night for Mitchell. Fulmer responded by holding an "emotional" team meeting Monday night and warning his team to avoid the Rocky Top Market, where several UT football players have found trouble during Fulmer's long tenure as coach. Mitchell has been suspended indefinitely from the team, and is scheduled to be eaten as punishment later this week.

On the board! BRAVO, SIR! BRAVO!