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Rome--or, er, Troy--is burning. Backup qb Mark Sanchez was arrested yesterday on charges of sexual assault around 4 pm PST regarding an alleged assault early Wednesday morning. The 19-year old Sanchez--or the 21 year old Jordan Traver Uttal, if you believe his fake ID--left the 901 club and returned to Cardinal Gardens, the apartment complex where two prior allegations of sexual assault against Trojan football players have been made in the past two years.

Quantifying how bad this looks for USC may be impossible. Two things must be mentioned to indicate the extent of said badness:

1. As our readers have pointed out, USC's "very concerned" point man for all of this is a guy named Michael Jackson. (And we thought he was in Dubai.)

2. This gives an excuse for Bill Simmons to stick his college football-contemptuous nose into our tidy corner of the internet by making his standard "Pete Carroll is not good" comment in a column.

Aside from the alleged sexual assault's inherent and complete badness: anything that allows Michael Jackson sex jokes and gives Bill Simmons an excuse to write anything about THE GAME is the opposite of good.

Fulmer Cup points pending.

Carroll: who knew you could find trouble in L.A.?