On February 10th, 2005, we made our first post on this website, clad only in our pajamas and the thin veil of a assumed name taken from a man who used to work on the Federal Trade Commission. We weren't really sure what we were doing--in truth, we're not sure what we're doing now--but in trying to come up with a site name to reflect our obsession, we found a cue in one of our favorite songs ever, the Dandy Warhols' "Every Day Should Be a Holiday:"
Summertime,
If I was getting paid
For getting drunk and getting laid.
Id grab a phone
Just to call you up and say
Quit your job
Cuz I got it made.
Anytime,
Baby lets go
Everyday should be a holiday.
Sounded good to us, provided you could mix in college football to the mix. And for the better part of a year, that's been the life we've led, minus the constant drinking and endless anonymous sex. (To paraphrase Professor Griff's line from the Public Enemy Behind The Music: "Cheat on the Conscience of a Nation? That's how n****z get shot.") We had 36 people our first day in business, and we're pretty sure we knew all of them personally.
Happy Birthday from rehab!
That's not the case now: 976, 217 visitors have killed expensive man/woman-hours reading our site, which speaks not only of the declining productivity of the American worker, but to the fact that American sports fans are so fascinated with college football that they require neither skill, accuracy, nor decent language to make the effort to read about it.
The site has been worth it just for the interaction with our readers, who've proven to be exactly what we imagined all along: mildly sociopathic, over-educated, boorish, fixated on sex, booze, and violence, and all in all great company to keep in a virtual community. So thanks are due--we will forget someone, so feel free to bitch in the comments, and we'll thank you profusely in a postscript.
Xiexie go to:
--Stranko, who was our original reader and our perpetual target audience. The site only had one rule: if he didn't think it was funny, we didn't print it. It's his low standards you can thank for some of the things we've posted.
--The Conscience of a Nation, for respecting our morphing into an internet gnome.
--Ma Swindle, who was visitor number 4, we think.
--Chris Lawrence of Signifying Nothing, who we think gave us our first link. Down from the jump-off, as it says in the sidebar.
--Brian from MGoBlog, who's actually good at this, and pimped us from the beginning.
--College Football Resource and Heismanpundit, who we thank together for starting an internet brawl that rages to this day and for linking early and often. HP still owes us 20 bucks.
--Warren St. John: Rammer Jammer! You did beat the hell out of us, but next year is in the 352, and Shaun Alexander and Freddie Milons are long, long gone.
--Kevin Donahue at Fanblogs, another reader who somehow found us under a digital rock.
--Boi From Troy, who gets thanks for linkage and the opportunity to guest blog on the BFT site, which helped us capture the crucial gay college football fan demo.
--Joey of Straight Bangin'. Ghostface approves.
--Paul Westerdawg at Georgia Sports. The man links-a-plenty and makes mix tapes of Larry Munson dialogue played over James Brown songs. Sometimes genius doesn't get enough recognition...
--The whole gaggle at Blue-Gray Sky, who linked early and got the Notre Dame army to pay attention to a Florida blog after our coach ditched you for us. Great guys who we'll hopefully get to FnDC with some day in Chicago.
--Bill from ATL Eagle, who proved what many thought scientifically impossible: a Boston College football blog could survive a whole year on the internet.
--Solon, our gambling correspondent, who we hope has a new car now.
--Ian from Sexy Results, the funniest blogger. Period. Ever. On hiatus writing his epic bildungsroman about a tender lad rent asunder by the cauldron of sin that is the University of Virginia. Hurry back.
--Kanu, one of our earliest readers.
--Todd of 1000 Movies, who we still owe a drink.
--Every message board lurker who posted one of our links.
--SI On Campus, for being one of the few mainstream media site wise to the value of utilizing unpaid labor in generating content.
We're forgetting people, but the band's playing now, and those who mess with Bill Conti wake up in alleys with broken knees. In conclusion, thanks to you, the reader, and to the employers you cheat by reading us. It's been well worth any time and minimal effort we put into the site in the payoff we get from your comments.
Thanks,
Orson (sniff!)
ps. A special thank you to Phil Fulmer, who we'd like to remind you is very, very fat.