MAC ACTION: CALIENTE OTRA VEZ!
The DJL Zone gets all hot and bothered with his choice preview of the mighty MAC. Ole!
August 19, 2025
HOWDY, DEATH PENALTY!
Houston does some Texas-sized cheating, according to CNNSI.com. If it’s really this bad-25 grades changed improperly-how could the death penalty not enter the picture for the first time since SMU? And how ’bout FAMU? (HT, ATLEagle.)
SHORT ATTENTION SPAN THEATER: FRIDAY EDITION
-We believe that Urban Meyer hasn’t found a fifth receiver-what we don’t believe is that Nyan Boateng runs a 3.8 in the forty. If he does, he’d run a 3.2 at FSU, though.
-Jersey boy Brian Cushing is wowing the Trojans as a freshman with his athleticism. Sadly for Boi, no manbeef shots yet. In other news of the rich getting richer, Warren Buffett just found the hundy you lost at the bar last night on the ground, and there’s no way he’s giving that shit back.
Buffett, seen here whispering profanities into a young coed’s ear, isn’t giving the 100 back.
-Georgia’s formidable online presence includes the venerable Anti-Orange Radio, a station devoted to Dawg coverage and Larry Munson worship. They’re looking for sixty-five bucks-someone scrap the beer money for a week and help them out, eh? Westerdawg, who directed us to them, also posts on Boise’s defense and the probable Georgia counterstrategy to their cram-the-box style. (Hmm…cramming boxes…) Likely answer? Lots of passing to Leonard Pope at tight end, which the Dawgs will have to get used to since in their unsophisticated attack they’ve never done it before.
-In Vol news: Voluminous is on top of all things Orange, including the double trouble of injured center Richie Gandy and the still-”scrambled” UT secondary, while UT opponent Notre Dame is having math problems according to the ever-studious guys over at Blue-Gray Sky.
-We’d love to have some UVA news, but Ian’s laptop has gone all “Johnny Got His Gun” on us.
-Warren, we got our book-much thanks. The global animosity toward Carrot Top really is astonishing. BUY RAMMER JAMMER YELLOW HAMMER!!! Give money to a struggling Ivy Leaguer today!
GUNSLINGER: LOOKING FOR A FIGHT
One of our new faves, Gunslingers, is looking for a fight.
ENIGMAS WRAPPED IN RIDDLES COATED WITH MYSTERY: GATOR ROSTER ‘05
“No one knows anything.” It’s William Goldman’s quote about Hollywood and the people who run it, but it might as well apply to the average, slapdick college fan versus “those-in-the-know” going into the college football season. Certain predictive shibboleths remain: USC’s probably going to be really good, Texas will probably just barely miss another national title shot, and Bill Snyder will frown mightily and be in the film room ’til three. Those are pretty safe bets, especially since we’re talking about teams, coaches, and the institutional changes that occur slowly over periods of many years.
This just in: Snyder to frown this season.
The real enigma comes in the form of players. Players are the weak link in any fan’s tarot deck, since players are the least dependable variable in the equation: frustratingly unpredictable and human, they flake out, they get arrested, they get Lyme Disease or throw a beer keg at someone’s head. Sometimes they just disappear for long stretches of the season. Sometimes they throw five picks versus Penn State and cause an old man to have a heart attack. Schemes and tendencies can be picked apart in the film room; players, and their very young, fragile psyches, often times escape analysis even on the plushest of psychologists’ couches.
In Florida’s case, the response of individual players to Urban Meyer’s extreme makeover of the Gator program will dictate outcomes this year, and those individual outcomes will be maddeningly unpredictable from player to player.
A few of Florida’s great mysteries this year:
1. DeShawn Wynn. We remember watching his scorching td run against Miami in 2002 and thinking that what a horrifying juggernaut of a runner he would be over the next four years. (Watching a running back that big pull away from ‘Canes safeties made the hairs on the back of our hands stand up a little in the same, primeval way that hunting or almost getting into an accident does.) What followed was three years of inconsistency, slack work ethic, and injury as he watched Ran Carthon and Ciatrick Fason clamp down on the starters’ slot. Wynn was one of Meyer’s first targets for public needling, and responded well initially before flaking out and potentially getting himself suspended for the first game with an undisclosed rules violation. If Wynn stops the Janus act and stays in line for a whole season, he’ll be on Cribs in two years showing off his hastily-decorated, flat-screen-bedecked InstaMansion. (”This is my Scarface room…”) If not, he’ll be practice-squadding it with Chris Doering. His choice.
DeShawn, this bland but expensive house could be yours with a consistent season.
2. Dallas Baker… (more…)
