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Ernie Sims, who allegedly used his girlfriend as a tackling dummy over the summer, and A.J. Nicholson, tasered after fleeing police, will both start for Florida State against Miami on September 3rd. Don't worry, though: Bowden promises the players will pay for their mistakes, even if it's not with a suspension.

"There are more ways to discipline other than suspension," Bowden said at the Atlantic Coast Conference's football media kickoff. "You've heard of pain, haven't you?"

That kinky bitch. Who knew Bowden makes blue-chippers play master and servant for their offseason sins? There's a legendary photoshop waiting here, but we have problems making GTA: San Andreas work, much less getting that mod where you bone a woman without taking your clothes off to work. Anyone willing to superimpose the head of Bobby Bowden on a dominatrix will receive our highest honor, to be determined at a later date.

In an additional tidbit, here's a heavily qualified "Is Bowden losing control" piece from Pat Forde. Dadgum factor: one.