An Ode To College Football
As summer doth wane, from the Hill to the Plains
A new quest for glory springs nigh.
From the Big House to the Hedges; fraternity pledges,
Alumni and students all cry:
"This is our year!", then crack open a beer,
As so-called experts ponder the worth,
Of scheduling cupcakes, and last season heartaches
In predicting a BCS berth.
College Football soon kicks! And the All-American picks
Will soon prove their skill in battle.
And with victory demands, we’ll load up the stands
Packed shoulder to shoulder like cattle.
And some of our teams, sport brand new regimes,
And starters as green as the field.
Urban almost retired, Charlie Weis was fired
And Pete Carroll laid down his shield.
To Sundays players bolted, like Timmy and Colt did
Leaving big shoes to fill.
Every spring practice a new star, raises the bar
While some blue-chippers never will.
The start of a new college season, gives us all reason
To remember the truest truth told.
We are all undefeated, expectations are meted,
As the calendar begins to unfold.
Oh, give me WAC track meets and coaches on hot seats.
Give me Athlon predictions gone wrong.
Give me Wildcat formations, superb trickerations,
Give me old men crooning fight songs.
Second tier rules infractions, coaches name redactions,
A rivalry game in the snow.
Rain turning The Swamp into muck, a QB named Luck
And a crowd begging the coach to "GO!"
Give me Touchdown Jesus, cheerleaders to plead us
To scream for our team down two tuddys.
Give me tailgates, Hail Marys, Fourth and One carries
(but you can keep your Stadium Buddies).
BCS Busters, the strength underdogs muster
To rise up and defeat their foe.
Give me SEC speed, the Stanford Tree
And the fickleness of "Big Mo".
Give me punts and passes, Joe Pa’s thick glasses
And Navy’s rushing attack.
Give me goal line stands, and the Battle of the Bands
Give me a Cinderella team from the MAC.
Give me three yards and a cloud, Senior Day parents so proud,
Give me games on Tuesday nights.
Give me Apple Cups and Egg Bowls, burgers over hot coals,
Even give me some pre-game fights.
Now in 2010, we begin yet again
That beautiful ritual we know.
Wear our team on our backs, let our hygiene lax
And pray for the Jan. 10th Bowl.
Happy College Football y’all!
— Way back in the gory glory days of our romper room site, an intrepid reader named Whitey penned
this magical poetic dedication to the greatest sport on earth. Here is his sequel effort, dedicated with rabid, foaming love to the 2010 season bearing down with all speed.
