MUSTACHE WEDNESDAY: ANONYMOUS, HEROIC ASTROS FAN
Baseball blows hooker goats, but this fan’s mustache is no one’s ho. Pimp, stand forward.
Happy Mustache Wednesday, you beautiful man, you.
HT: The Fightins’
May 28, 2008
May 21, 2008
MUSTACHE WEDNESDAY: ORLANDO BLOOM
How do you turn a refined-looking, bow-wielding Elvish warrior into a redneck car thief in one fell swoop?
Happy Mustache Wednesday, motherfuckers!
He just looks like he’s about to tell you your exhaust manifold needs to be replaced and that he’s impregnated your daughter, doesn’t he?
May 5, 2008
GUTEN CINCO DE MAYO!
Whilst Patrick is sporting immense celebratory lip coverage over at Thirty-Five Seconds, we’re prepping for some margaritas with our favorite tri-cultural hero from south of the border: Die schnellste Maus von Mexiko!
Enjoy your Cinco. We’ll see you tomorrow.
April 30, 2008
MUSTACHE WEDNESDAY: THAT GUY
We don’t know who that guy is, but he peed on the sliding glass door at our party, and we had to kick him out. He drank the last Pearl Beer out of the fridge and then tried to stick his hand down your girlfriend’s pants. He just got out, but not of the army, if you know what I mean. He told those guys at Lowe’s they could keep their fucking job, dude. He went to the Bullet Boys concert and it was awesome, especially the part where he got a blowjob in a port-o-let. His credit sucks. He wants you to co-sign a car loan, and you know he’s good for it because you bought weed from him and he gave you the dankest of the dank in return.
He’s that guy, and he wishes you a happy Mustache Wednesday, motherfuckers!
April 23, 2008
MUSTACHE WEDNESDAY: BLOGGER EDITION
We’ve already grown our own mustache for Mustache Wednesday, but other bloggers took up the torch for us for this Wednesday. Okay, one blogger specifically: LD from Gunslingers, who unveiled not only the shirtless and sexy look, but showed off a copper cow-catcher for a formidable man-train ready to plow through the great plain of his day.
Andiamo, LD! ANDIAMO!
April 17, 2008
THE URBSTACHE, WITH SOUNDTRACK
Don’t ever stop believing, people. Urban won’t let you.
THE URBSTACHE
Urban Meyer, on a gallivanting tour of the known world INCLUDING CINCINNATI!, addressed the Cincinnati Bearcats, told them they were on the way toward being a great team, national title contenders, all those other things you’re supposed to say when the other coach asks you to talk to the team…but WHOA HOLY SHIT LOOK AT THAT:
Stuntin’ like your daddy : he looks like Mark Spitz if he hadn’t pansied out, put on a speedo, and spent a decade splashing around and staring at a line of black tiles on the floor, or perhaps a more charismatic, less retarded Phil McConkey, or even Tom Cruise, back when he was just a confused young pre-clear banging Mimi Rogers. Or, as the Maj suggests, a young Robert Kerman, better remembered as the dude from the opening scene of Debbie Does Dallas, a gifted man in his own right.
April 16, 2008
MUSTACHE OF THE DAY: GAY ZORRO
Our mustache of the day goes to: George Hamilton in Zorro, The Gay Blade.
Happy Mustache Wednesday, motherfuckers!
April 2, 2008
MUSTACHE WEDNESDAY: LIONEL RICHIE
We had a dream: we had an awesome dream. It involved Ryan Perriloux flipping out in a restaurant. Getting details, but in the meantime, why don’t we take a minute on life’s lonesome highway and find a friend or two? And by friend, we mean: a quality mustache like Lionel Richie’s.
Happy Mustache Wednesday, motherfuckers!
Karamu, fiesta, forever!
March 20, 2008
MOUSTACHE THURSDAY: MARK SPITZ
Today’s Moustache Thursday, which is certainly not to be confused with Mustache Wednesday, is Olympian hero Mark Spitz!
Spitz, as you may recall, won seven gold medals in Munich in 1972, an unbroken record to this day. If you’re under 40, you may not know that regardless of her marital status at the time, your mother wanted to fuck the living shit out of Mark Spitz. Well, at least until he talked, anyway. So you may lament the fact that when you look in the mirror, you don’t see what’s staring back at you right here. Blame your mother’s lack of dedication. If she wanted Spitz, she should have tried harder, and now look at you.
Happy Moustache Thursday, motherfuckers!
Loading ...
