DOLLAR BILL DOUG SAYS THREE WINS IS BETTER THAN NONE
Dollar Bill Doug comes off going Full Costanza with his best results of the year last week, and hopes to continue the hotness into a late season streak bringing him closer to .500. Or .300. Or…he’s building towards next year, people, and it’s important to get some game experience under his belt is what we’re saying. Enjoy.
RISK LEVEL 1: Watching the “awesometits.wmv” video your friend sent you on your work computer
Stanford -7.5 vs. California, 7:30 p.m.
What do you know: Turns out going full Costanza actually worked pretty well last week. OK, it didn’t work perfectly, but 3-2 still beats the 0-5s I was routinely putting up when I was going with my gut. (Stupid gut — it’s the one who told me AIG was “too big to fail” and that the guy who offered to sell me weed in a Vegas airport bathroom totally wasn’t a cop.) This week my gut’s been hinting that Stanford can’t possibly have a whole lot left in the tank after steamrolling Oregon and USC to the tune of 106 total points in back-to-back weeks, but if a major letdown was such a big risk for these guys, they probably would’ve lost to USC to begin with; as long as they’ve got Toby Gerhart (might some Heisman love be in line for this gentleman? Hello? Is this thing on?), they’ve got juice to spare. Maybe the one we should be asking those questions about is Cal — sure, they managed to come from behind to beat Arizona last week, but back-to-back big-game wins haven’t exactly been the forte of recent editions of the TedfordBot. (Don’t worry, though — when TedfordBot Vista comes out next year, all those problems will be solved. Really. We promise.)
RISK LEVEL 2: Peeing in front of a bunch of Georgia fans
Tennessee -16 vs. Vanderbilt, 7 p.m.
Following a world-class reaming from DEX-TAH MAH-CLUS-TAH and the Rebels, Tennessee returns home this weekend to lick their wounds, check in with their probation officers, and swat away a team who’s beaten them only once in their last 26 tries. (more…)







Colorado-West Virginia may be the headliner this Thursday night, but the undercard at Legion field provides the better opportunity for moneymaking. Once upon a time, Southern Miss played the Lucy to UAB’s Charlie Brown, letting them hang in the game just long enough to gather a little hope before yanking the ball away and sending them to defeat (seven straight losses from 2000 to ‘06, by a total of 37 points). Since Neil Callaway became UAB’s head coach, though, Lucy has stopped yanking the ball away at the last moment and decided to simply blast Charlie Brown in the chest with a Mossberg before he can even start running. Southern Miss has won the last two games by a total score of 107-21, and with UAB’s defense languishing at 116th in the country, there’s no reason to think USM’s offense won’t be dumping a ton more points on them. Don’t feel bad, though, Blazers — you’ll always have Rice.







