CURIOUS INDEX, 3/25/08
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Karma’s a motherfucker. Clemson’s losing tailbacks just after they cut Ray-Ray McElrathbey. Make a snide laugh now, because this will all end up with Tommy Bowden running through the streets of Clemson handing out cooked goose on Christmas and embracing crippled children. The part with the ghost of Christmas Past featuring Jackie Sherrill in the role will be especially frightening, because Sherrill will be naked and drunk. Bears Necessity examines out of conference schedules and concludes that the Big East is the real out-of-conference road warrior–and that’s not just the Mountaineers calling in either with their traditional forty point bowl shootout. He also notes that business class on Singapore airlines rules. If it doesn’t come with a complimentary compulsory caning of a random passenger in coach for chewing gum too loudly in their seat, it’s NOT Singapore Airlines! Bill Callahan had them playing tag, dammit. We would kill for an uncensored spring practice audio of Bo Pelini in his first spring as Nebraska head football coach working with the defense. According to Pelini: Callahan wouldn’t call what he had the defense doing tag, exactly; rather, it was a “binomial game of optional tactical label transfer, with status dependent on pursuit, angle calculation, and escape strategies.” Or, yeah: tag. Heivaha Mafi: can haz hair. Heivaha Mafi, Juco transfer for UNLV, is your latest shock-haired raging Polynesian badass, according to the Runnin’ Rebels coach Mike Sanford: “(Mafi’s) got a lot of hair,” coach Mike Sanford said, “and he plays with it on fire.” Mafi’s playing for a starting spot at the hybrid DE/LB spot, marking yet another appearance of the Patriot end in college football out of a flexy 3-4 that can, in a snap, morph to a 4-3. They call Alabama The Crimson Tide, so call me Faggy McGee. The greatest hangover/sleep deprivation song ever helped us through a long, airport delay-ridden day yesterday. The story behind the chorus: It was originally speculated that the song was written about the Wake Forest University Demon Deacons, but in a Rolling Stone interview, Donald Fagen said “Walter and I had been working on that song at a house in Malibu. I played him that line, and he said, “You mean it’s like, ‘They call these cracker assholes this grandiose name like the Crimson Tide, and I’m this loser, so they call me this other grandiose name, Deacon Blues?’ ” And I said, “Yeah!” He said, “Cool! Let’s finish it!” Thank you, cracker assholes of Alabama, for making that song happen. Oh, and for beating us twice in 1999. That was awesome. |
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