THE MORNING CONSTITUTIONAL SALUTES THE VOTERS OF NORTH ALABAMA

Jerry Markland

YOUR PATRIOTISM IS ALREADY PAYING OFF

Until 2010, Cullman, Alabama was a dry city, which rumoredly played a part in Mercedes's decision to put their plant near Tuscaloosa and not in Cullman. It also made for a pretty boring Oktoberfest, I'm guessing, unless you really love spaetzle. But democracy did its thing, and the people of Cullman decided they wanted to be able to drink outside of their homes.

And now we have this:

See how much more fun booze makes you? You're creative and artsy and witty now, and after you have two more beers you're going to think "say, maybe we should dress a fourth grader up like Nick Saban and have him yell at an adult dressed like a ref to put a second back on the clock before Coach Malzahn gets up there to talk." And you should do that. You should absolutely do that, and that kid should then get hired by an Illinois team that accidentally thinks he really is Nick Saban.

All because of the power of the ballot box. GOD #BLESS AMERICA.

EDIT: OH MY GOD IT GETS EVEN BETTER

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