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Ladies, Gentlemen, ne'er do wells:
Times have changed
The Czechs were getting old
We beat Jaromir Jagr
And have a chance to go for gold
We can beat the Finnish
And beat the Swedish too
But before then there’s one thing we have to do!
BEAT CANADA!
BEAT CANADA!
With that big stupid maple leaf
And hockey stars with no teeth
BEAT CANADA!
BEAT CANADA!
Phil’s going to score another goal!
Straight through the five hole!
Don’t blame us for Patrick Kane
He met Canuckistanis now he’s
Such a crying shame.
And Dustin Brown once used to be an Eagle Scout.
But now he tells old ladies to fuck themselves.
Well, BEAT CANADA!
BEAT CANADA!
The reason everything’s gone
wrong
Is that Canada came along.
BEAT CANADA!
BEAT CANADA!
It’s not even a real country
anyway.
Americans have football baseball soccer,
Yes its true
And Canada loves hockey more than we love barbecue
Should we let them beat us?
Should we let it slide?
Should we let Don Cherry swell with pride?
FUCK NO!
BEAT CANADA! BEAT CANADA!
With all their hockey hullabaloo
And that fuckstick Beiber too
BEAT CANADA! DEFEAT CANADA!
For . . .
We’re team USA
We’ll go all the way
We’re going to be bold and shoot for the gold
We’ll beat Canucks and cause a fussWhen Putin gives the gold medal to us!!!