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An Important Message From Sheila Broflovski

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Ladies, Gentlemen, ne'er do wells:

Times have changed

The Czechs were getting old

We beat Jaromir Jagr

And have a chance to go for gold

We can beat the Finnish

And beat the Swedish too

But before then there’s one thing we have to do!

BEAT CANADA!

BEAT CANADA!

With that big stupid maple leaf

And hockey stars with no teeth

BEAT CANADA!

BEAT CANADA!

Phil’s going to score another goal!

Straight through the five hole!

Don’t blame us for Patrick Kane

He met Canuckistanis now he’s

Such a crying shame.

And Dustin Brown once used to be an Eagle Scout.

But now he tells old ladies to fuck themselves.

Well, BEAT CANADA!

BEAT CANADA!

The reason everything’s gone

wrong

Is that Canada came along.

BEAT CANADA!

BEAT CANADA!

It’s not even a real country

anyway.

Americans have football baseball soccer,

Yes its true

And Canada loves hockey more than we love barbecue

Should we let them beat us?

Should we let it slide?

Should we let Don Cherry swell with pride?

FUCK NO!

BEAT CANADA! BEAT CANADA!

With all their hockey hullabaloo

And that fuckstick Beiber too

BEAT CANADA! DEFEAT CANADA!

For . . .

We’re team USA

We’ll go all the way

We’re going to be bold and shoot for the gold

We’ll beat Canucks and cause a fussWhen Putin gives the gold medal to us!!!

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