"I salute the section of our lordly Sunday journals which is entitled Scores of College Football Games Continued from Page One,
Because there a flock of not very notorious institutions of learning find their annual place in the sun.
Yes, the football season is a kindly time of year,
And during it we read of campuses of which at other times we do not often hear.
Would a playwright, for instance, ordinarily select Aurora as the Alma Mater for his hero?
Yet it is here recorded that Aurora one week held Wright Jr. to a six-to-six tie and the next week took the measure of Wartburg, nineteen to zero.
Yes, and the St. Cloud Teachers are an aggregation that no college-lover can conscientiously shelve,
Because they nosed out the Bemidji Teachers thirteen to twelve.
Oh ye of little faith who take Yale and Notre Dame for your Alpha and Omega,
What about Hiwassee, which outscored Biltmore, and Dillard, which engaged in a Homeric deadlock with Talladega?
When better endowments are offered,
Well, what's the matter with Augustana and Millsaps and Spearfish and Gustavus Adolphus and Wofford?
So if anybody makes derogatory remarks about the football season let us answer with scornful defiance,
And meanwhile let us not forget that Huron beat Yankton six to nothing on the very same day that Jamestown smothered Wahpeton Science."
- Ogden Nash, "One Man's Need is Another Man's Overemphasis"