FanPost

Fan Therapy: Create Disastrous Play-by-Play Calls for Your Favorite Team

I've been a Georgia Tech fan my entire life, and for obvious reasons, the last two or three seasons have been especially trying times (but our bowl streak is still alive!). It's not that the results are particularly bad; 6 or 7 win seasons have become a tradition over the last decade. The real issue is that Tech is a program without hope. Our coach is infuriatingly stubborn, can't recruit, and oh yeah, got his contract extended so damn far into the future that only Marty McFly could fire him. To make matters worse, long time play-by-play announcer, Wes Durham (who is universally loved), up and left the radio network for a TV deal this Summer.

To replace Durham, GT just hired Butler's play-by-play man. My buddy sent me a youtube video of the new announcer calling a buzzer beater for Butler and said "get ready for a lot of this". To which I replied, NO, get ready for a lot of this:

"Lee under center with 3 wide. Bostic coming around in motion as Lee takes the snap. Lee pitches to Bostic and HE IS BLOWN UP BEHIND THE LINE OF SCRIMMAGE....WOW! I tell you what, Randy, they just aren't fooling anybody right now. Loss of 2 on the play, and Tech will have to punt for the third time this quarter."

And I'll tell YOU what sports fans, it felt really good to create that call. In fact, it felt so good that my friend and I started calling an entire game of Paul Johnson offense mishaps: full back dives for 2 yards on 3rd and 8, throwing the ball 20 feet over a running back's head who looks like he has never run a route in practice before, doing the fake 4th down wing back motion thing where we try to draw the D off (it never fucking works).

An hour later the score was UGA 42 GT 6 (we botched an extra point snap), and I couldn't have felt better. I highly recommend doing this for your favorite teams. This works for just about everyone but asshole Bama fans who really can't do this because their coach never makes any mistakes. For everyone else, just call a shit game where everything goes wrong and your coach shows all of his dumb ass tendencies. You'll feel a lot better, trust me.

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