THE CURIOUS INDEX, 7/19/2013

IT'S GROUNDHOG DAY, JOHNNY

THE FUN AND HORSEY SAUCE GUN. Yes, there's the moment when Steve Spurrier was caught by Jadeveon Clowney reaching into the condiment station as a stunned father and son beheld Palmetto Sasquatch and his swagged out coach--who makes three million a year AND IS STILL STUNTIN' AT ARBY'S--but this is the internet. The internet doesn't reflect reality; it takes the cheap pieces of squalid reality, and assembles them into a Lego set of true spectacularity.

On the internet, Arby's can talk to college football bloggers about Steve Spurrier, and that's why Prometheus stole fire from the gods. (photo via GABA)

GIGGI-TAAAAY NOSTALGIA. First-rank work by Brandon Marcello on talking to all the principals in the Mitch Mustain/Malzahn/Nutt debacle known around these parts as Las Cronicas, and known now as something that amounted to a fairly influential clusterfuck.

To wit:

  • Houston Nutt goes to Ole Miss, who beats Florida at home in 2008, sparking Florida's run to a national title.
  • Mustain flees to USC, where he never sees serious action and is at one point their backup-backup punter.
  • Rather than building himself into the woodwork at Arkansas, Malzahn eventually ends up at rival Auburn, and is now widely regarded as half the reason that ever happened at all. (The other 49% is Cam Newton, and the remaining 1% is a statistical margin of error called Gene Chizik.)

There's also a reminder in the story about the time Houston Nutt was called a dork by one of his own players, and that alone makes it worth reading.

NO SIMILARITIES WHATSOEVER. The O'Bannon suit gets its six amateurs, including Clemson DB Darius Robinson, who joined the suit partly due to his business running into compliance issues with the NCAA.

WE'D SUPPORT THIS BUT OH SHIT-- Yay, it's a bill slagging the NCAA. Boo, it's being sponsored by a Penn State alum for extremely partisan reasons.

WELL IT'S ABOUT TIME. ATVS finally gets around to actual barbecue, which is only excused by Lousianans having so many other good forms of food to get through in a cooking series that barbecue comes in somewhere around 43rd place.

HELLO UNIVERSITY OF PHOENIX, BIG TEN MEMBER. At last, the way is being forged for membership of PCU to some conference somewhere.

SURE, HAVE THIS BIT OF RANDOM GENIUS.

ETC: BIDEN IN THE HOUSE.

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