THE CURIOUS INDEX, 04/01/2013

WE BUILT THIS CITY ON BOOLEAN CODE

R.I.P. MAL MOORE. Alabama's athletic director emeritus passed away this weekend. Remember him thusly.

COME ONE, COME ALL. Less than a week until Florida's spring game, which will feature AT LEAST FOUR healthy offensive linemen! That's enough for most board games, or a spirited round of golf, and definitely plenty to move a queen - dare I say, even a CALIFORNIA KING - mattress! Bring the kids!

THIS FALL IN A THEATER NEAR YOU. They were each wanderers. They each had trouble with commitment. Made promises they hadn't kept. When everything else had gone bad for these two, they found each other. And maybe, just maybe, they'd make it work - with a Skyline Chili Playbook. (Direct to DVD.)

YOU ARE NOW BYU'S STARTING QB. Already without projected starter Taysom Hill, Brigham Young saw sophomore Ammon Olsen go down for what they're hoping is six weeks with a torn PCL. Bronco Mendenhall is going to coach the heck out of you, and when he's done, you'll be salted and kept in his smokehouse, because Bronco Mendenhall eats quarterback meat.

CAN YOU TEACH ME BOUT TOMORROW WITH ALL THE PAIN AND SORROW. Texas also had its spring game, and the reviews are mixed - young guys look good, David Ash continues to be all things to all people, and tempo is an issue. The important takeaway? We made a Hootie and the Blowfish song stuck in your head.

WHY JOURNALISM IS NOT ADVERTISING. For those so inclined, here's an update from Georgia Tech after the team's first spring scrimmage. The first six words of this story: "New Georgia Tech defensive coordinator Ted Roof." The penultimate sentence of this story: "Sunday is the deadline for renewal for football season tickets." HEY NOW DON'T EVERYBODY CALL THE TICKET OFFICE AT ONCE.

ETC. If Bill Murray's at a bar with two Wu-Tang members, you get a video of ALL OF THEM. You would look awesome in this, T. Boone. FREE TUCCI. Yes, but could Debbie Harry have pulled this off with Jimmy Carter?

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