MIAMI HAD REASON TO CELEBRATE, SO THEY DID
The NCAA admitted wrongdoing in its case against Miami yesterday, giving the Hurricanes and their administrators reason to celebrate. As Miami does, they went to the club.
11:15 p.m. After being kicked out of a five hour dinner at 1500 Degrees, Miami President Donna Shalala and entourage arrive at LIV. Shalala parks on curb, leaves note reading "PARK IN COLON OF NCAA."
11:32 p.m. "The forecast calls for...HURRICANES!!! DALE!!!!"
11:50 p.m. Longtime Shalala confidant Trina and Senator Marco Rubio join Shalala in VIP. Shalala offers Rubio bottle of water, then hurriedly pulls it away and takes a sip. They laugh.
12:35 a.m. Bottles.
12:58 a.m. Shalala nods in direction of former Miami coach Jimmy Johnson, who exits the building a few seconds later with a blushing Serena Williams on his arm.
1:18 a.m. Al Golden challenges Shalala to full-count Stalingrad Bottle Siege. Shalala accepts.
"CALL ME THE SECRETARY OF WEALTH AND BOOMIN' TWERKVICES" Shalala roared as she finished the bottle, and then shattered it on the ground in celebration. More bottles were ordered.
1:56 a.m. A glum Randy Shannon is turned away at the door, and walks away shaking his head.
2:34 a.m. Shalala takes the dance floor.
3:22 a.m. An altercation ends the evening. One young male is taken to the hospital.
He is listed in critical condition.